The Mr. and I had a brief experimental period years ago, and we attended several swingers parties. They are more like a jr. high dance than anyone would ever like to believe--lots of people standing around looking nervous. It seemed that for the majority, they only felt comfortable acting on their impulses if they were well-lubricated with adult beverages. Me, I wanted to remember it all; if I don't want to do it sober, (whatever "it" is), I don't want to do it.

Going to the party was the Mr's idea, and I was very nervous with all the usual insecurities, and was sure no one would give me a second look. He figured he was going to get laid a lot. Turns out, that's not how it worked out, and ultimately, we quit at his request. It didn't live up to the fantasy for him; for me, it was an amazing time, except for the very grumpy hubby. And that was enough for me to let it go. I would say we learned a great deal about ourselves, and each other, from the experience, but it also took us to the very edge as a couple; we were lucky we were able to step back from a fatal drop.

I would recommend you go with very low expectations, and some ground rules decided upon in advance as to what is acceptable and what is not, and stick to it. It is not for the faint of heart.

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