A GERMAN theatre said it was looking for three naked ushers to help show guests to their seats at the premiere of a new play this week.

The play, "Atta Atta - art breaks free," is by Christoph Schlingensief and opens Thursday at the Berliner Volksbuehne in central Berlin.

Schlingensief is a reputed provocateur behind a string of publicity-seeking stunts, such as sticking pins into a voodoo doll made out to look like one of Germany's top politicians.

Last year he narrowly escaped prosecution for alleged incitement after torching a straw puppet lookalike of Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon.

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The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
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One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
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Now, I can see how naked usher"ettes" could be a real great thing. "Mamm, I dropped my keys in my lap, could you help me find them. They're with something hard and long."

I might sit through the play twice ... and not remember a word that was said.