
10-14-2005, 04:22 AM
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Just me.
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: West central Illinois
Posts: 590,002
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The Way Kids See Things
I got these from my daughter and thought they were totally delightful. Hope you enjoy ...
The Way Children See Things!
NUDITY
I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a Woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, "Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!
HONESTY
My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he'd dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. So I fished it out and threw it in the
garbage. Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to my bathroom and came out with my toothbrush. He held it up and said with a harming little smile, "We better throw this one out too then, 'cause it fell in the toilet a few days ago.
OPINIONS
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a Note from his mother. The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."
MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"
ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. The various ppliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs, unfailingly intrigued her. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"
DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit."
"And why not, darling?"
"You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning."
SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother. "I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk!"
BIBLE
A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. "Mama, look what I found", the boy called out." What have you got there, dear?" With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear!
Last edited by dicksbro : 10-14-2005 at 04:49 AM.
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10-14-2005, 04:37 AM
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Pixies Horse Widower
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Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Scotland
Posts: 9,475
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__________________
The selfish, they're all standing in line
Faithing and hoping to buy themselves time
Me, I figure as each breath goes by
I only own my mind
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10-14-2005, 04:41 AM
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Mod with Bite
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Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Vegemite....nuff said!!
Posts: 13,502
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How precious LMAO
Thanx DB
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Equality for all
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10-14-2005, 05:31 AM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: North Australia
Posts: 17,687
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New eyes, wonderful.
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Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating
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10-14-2005, 05:58 AM
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~a little bit naughty~
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Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Georgia
Posts: 23,422
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LMAO! Adam's underwear! 
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10-14-2005, 06:09 AM
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is not this trim anymore!
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Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: New England
Posts: 21,709
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That's it...I'm drying a leaf and framing it. Too funny! Thanks DB.
__________________
Though I am different from you,
We were born involved in one another.
For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.
Complete surrender should not just come at moments in which one faces overwhelming odds, but in the calm when it seems one is personally in complete control of one's life.
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10-14-2005, 08:35 AM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: okla.
Posts: 9,323
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Very good DB ty
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The mind never forgets what the hands have learned
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10-14-2005, 08:54 AM
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ThePower of Chinese Woman
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Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 985
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hahahahah  oh that is funny and cute
__________________
In other countries like Far East Asia women are still held in LOWER esteem BUT in China, it’s a different story. Chinese women are much more aggressive and outspoken and held in Higher esteem.” I love Communist that provides males and females Equality and WOMEN’S Rights in China.
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10-14-2005, 09:27 AM
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Larger Than Life
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Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: i come from a land downunder
Posts: 597
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very funny, its a pitty they gtow up
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10-14-2005, 09:35 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: T.O.
Posts: 20,828
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I love the note on the first day of school. My dad was a teacher in my school so I'm pretty sure he warned my teachers about me well in advance. :halo:
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10-14-2005, 10:58 AM
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pixie of the wood
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Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 10,575
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:grin:
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10-14-2005, 10:18 PM
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Tells it all
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Massivetwotits
Posts: 22,142
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Sweet
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"Enjoy life. There's plenty of time to be dead."
Live Life, hearses don't come with luggage racks.
The second mouse always gets the cheese
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10-16-2005, 09:36 AM
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Everybody Stretch!
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Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Pa. USA
Posts: 11,637
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Just got around to this!
So very sweet!
For those of you who know or have a youngster about the age of 2-3 (won't work on younger or too much older), try this on them one day and watch their face as they try and figure it out...till they have to go running to ask Mom or Dad...
Make sure you have their undivided attention and that Mom and/or Dad is around somewhere and ask them...
"Do you remember when YOU were big and I was little and you used to walk me to the store"?
I asked a friends little girl this once and after she thought about in earnest for a moment, she ran to her Mom and said, "Mommy...was I big before"? ROFLMFAO!
__________________
Minds are like parachutes. They only work when they are open.
~Thomas Dewar~
Last edited by LixyChick : 10-16-2005 at 10:00 AM.
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10-16-2005, 09:46 AM
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Suprise Me
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Join Date: Mar 2003
Posts: 4,259
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LOL! That was awesome DB!!!
Lixy - 
__________________
A blessed thing it is for any man or woman to have a friend, one human soul whom we can trust utterly, who knows the best and worst of us, and who loves us in spite of all our faults.
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10-16-2005, 10:32 AM
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Just me.
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: West central Illinois
Posts: 590,002
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:grin: LOL @ Lixy! :grin:
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