I'm watching Lord of the G-strings on HBO


its funny but very stupid

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hungry? why wait.....eat me.

I was watching some terrible 80's porn friday night. This asian lady was wear a huge blonde wig, she had these big fake orange nails and enormous earrings that looked like they weighed 5 lbs each. She had a vibe that seriously looked liked something out of a torture chamber.

These two guys came in, she was saying,

"Oh, you hurt me! Oh I love it! Oh, oh, oh! Oh I want to fuck and fuck and fuck!" and I was just LMAO the entire time.

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It's a BOY!!

I love the one about Cinderella and her snapping pussy. Lixy knows which one I mean.

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The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas

... and then there were all the ones where some woman was shocked by the size of John Holmes, stating that it would never fit, and 5 seconds later he's deep inside her backdoor!

OMG... I've seen that one... LMAO!

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Put me on wheels and I'll turn tricks.

Clever? Nah, I ran out of that years ago. But if you find this, let me know, k?
"The road goes ever on..." ~ Tolkien

In memory of my friend skip...
Go then, there are other worlds than these

WPINK TV was the funniest one I've ever seenhas Ron Jeremy swing his Dick clock wise then counter clock wise then another sence where john the wad holmes comes in and the actress dose beleve it is him untell he opens his robe

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it's only kinky the first time

it's not the orgasm but getting there thats fun

a shot in the bush is worth two in the hand

whip me, beat me, tie me up, break my arm, but please don't break my heart

"The trouble with the world is that the stupid people are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt" -Bertrand Russell

Wish I still had WPINK TV.......was stolen from me by ex-roommate. The Bitch!!!!

I once saw a 3-D movie in a theater. It was funny seeing people duck as the cum appeared to be flying into the audience!

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There are two types of people in this world, good and bad. The good sleep better, but the bad seem to enjoy the waking hours much more. - Woody Allen

there was one that i downloaded where a women was getting DP'ed....she was moaning really loudly and she said do it harder and faster.....and the guy on top said....who?....she giggled and then said...BOTH!

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hungry? why wait.....eat me.

Flesh Gordon was another cute sexy spoof on an ol' hero.

A friend and I would always frequent the local porn store to check out the really cheap DVDs with hilarious plots (this was nothing but innocent). This is how I ended up owning "The Dickheads" (Like the "Coneheads"...but umm they have dicks on their heads) the most ridiculous movie ever...I couldn't get aroused by it if I tried...just too ridiculous for me. Also, there is "Bone Alone" which I couldn't finish watching it was so bad...and there were also some ones about leather-loving vampires and a soul-sucking woman in a wonder woman head band...

No more $6 porn for me.

I surf a lot of porn and some of the titles on text links are really funny - I think a lot of the TGP's are run out of Japan and translation gaps can make for some pretty amusing descriptions. I was surfing the other night and saw one that simply said: Wierd shit for the strange.

Haha, I couldn't stop laughing.

ROFLMAO That's my fave scene in pornos. The scripts aren't believable to begin with but they want us to suspend reality to pretend the women are virgins?

We busted my grandmother with "Porn-ochio...it's not his nose that grows!" and she, to this day, insists she picked it up by accident.

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Though I am different from you,
We were born involved in one another.

For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.

Complete surrender should not just come at moments in which one faces overwhelming odds, but in the calm when it seems one is personally in complete control of one's life.

i download all of my porn online cuz its better...
anyways, one of my favorite and most overused sayings is "no mi gusta" which is spanish for "i don't like"...
well i was watching this one movie with my boyfriend and ina scene where a latino woman is going down on this guy, he tells her to say something in spanish for him and she goes "no mi gusta"... and they just carried on like nothing, so he obviously didnt know what it meant, but to me, i thought it was hilarious. i wasnt so horny after that, i laughed too much.

then one time i stumbled across midget porn... that was fucking weird.... hilarious... but weird....