Please don't laugh, I am really truly clueless at this

If I see someone I'd like to meet in another part of a room, should I try and think of a pretext for moving there? Or should I just go right up to them and talk to them? How do I start a conversation from here that isn't awkward and pointless? Is this whole approach totally wrong? How do I keep from getting petrified in these situations?

__________________
I want to know everything
I want to be everywhere
I want to fuck everyone in the world
I want to do something that matters

If you can't comment on something they have on, are standing near, noticing etc. then I say just walk up and introduce yourself. It is normal to be nervous, it's just not ok to let the fear keep you from doing things/meeting people/getting involved. And no conversation you would begin is pointless, the point is predetermined, it's simply to speak with them.

__________________

The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas

Walk over with no pretense...if that person is speaking with someone else be polite and wait until there is a lag in the conversation and introduce yourself to that person and to the others. "Hi, I am __________." If that person isn't speaking with anyone, just say "I think this is an interesting place to be" or a topic that would be appropriate for why you and that other person may be in the room. Just an opening, nothing serious. Then the conversation can move on from there.

Personally, I don't have a problem talking to anyone, and I don't mind when someone I don't know walks over and introduces him/herself. Make a connection and go from there! Good Luck!

__________________
A blessed thing it is for any man or woman to have a friend, one human soul whom we can trust utterly, who knows the best and worst of us, and who loves us in spite of all our faults.

gotta go with the ladies on this one. and never NEVER say "pardon me. can I wear your ass as a hat?"

__________________

Funny when I first met Aqua and he said that, I just got the giggles:grin:

__________________

The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas

Hmmm...try to find something in common. I spoke to a guy tonight in the parking lot of the grocery store...introduced myself and commented on the fact that we both had Volvos. We had a great little chat.

And I lik eit when people talk to me ~ as long as they have a pleasant nonthreatening manner.

__________________
Life is too short not to love and be loved....preferably multiple times in one night.

I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them. ~ Jay McInerney

Do a Krameresque slide with a smile and compliment her. That'd be memorable!

Situations vary and just being yourself and use your natural talent for wit. If you still seem to be a bit shy--pratice. Just be friendly and learn to enjoy talking to people. When the time comes to approach a lady, things will be easier.

Once you engage in some small and if you sincerely wnjoy getting to know her, just tell her how much you liked talking to her and ask her if you can call her. It is that simple. The worst is to say she has a b/f or just isn't interested.

Oh--just one suggestion--don't stare at her breasts, look her in the eye--you might just be surprised how much she will enjoy being treated as a lady

Confidence comes from practice, I'm afraid. And, occasionally, alcohol....but practice generally yields better results.

Definately go over, ANY excuse will do. Have a reason, or just walk right to her. Frankly, seeing someone making a beeline for me across the room CAN be sexy as hell. That he's gotten up the nerve to introduce himself to me is a compliment.

When is more of an artform. There are points in every mixer type party when I'm so bored I want to start peeling the paint off the walls. If you're nervous, that's a really GOOD time to talk to me (and I'm guessing most other people), because I will be more than willing to help jump start a conversation.

As far as conversational topics, sometimes it's best to choose an opener that requires her participation. "That's an interesting lampshade the host is wearing," doesn't necessarily require as much from her as, "What do you think of our host's new headgear." If you follow me. Also, introduce yourself if you don't already know her. It doesn't have to be the first thing you say, although it can be. It's polite, and helps make a connection. It's a great way to show a non-threatening interest.

To add to the list of don'ts....don't use the pick-up line a drunken friend of mine claims to have tried. "Hi, I really hate your jacket. It's cute, and all, but I can't see your ass when you're wearing it." It didn't work, but I'm happy to report she didn't actually break his nose either .

Thanks a lot for everyone who has responded so far.

I should clarify that I'm not necessarily talking about parties, either, I'm also talking about situations like on the bus, in the cafeteria, etc.

__________________
I want to know everything
I want to be everywhere
I want to fuck everyone in the world
I want to do something that matters

Honey, A big irresistable smile and eye contact says it better than anything. It tells her you're interested and you can usually tell whether you're invited by her response to that smile.
Good luck!

__________________
I am here for only a short time on this earth. My goal is to make everyone I see smile if only for a moment.

On the bus...ask about the next stop
Grocery store...ask if a product is any good
Cafeteria...ask about a dish.....


asking will get you a long way. I'm not saying play dumb but you open a line of communication broadly when you ask a question and it tells that person that before you have even heard them, that what they think matters.

__________________

The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas

Striking while the iron is hot is good, too. If you're on a street and you make eye contact more than once . . . maybe compliment her on her dog, her shirt, anything!

I'm terribly shy and would rather crawl into a hole than talk to a person with the intenion of getting to know them better. (no comments from the peanut gallery, please)

But, I am great at small talk. Especially when just crossing paths with someone. At a party - "What're you drinking, that looks good?" Grocery store - "Someone told me that I should try (insert some food item here) but I don't know how to prepare it. Do you have any suggestions?" On the bus - "Steph, your dog just ate my shoe" oops, I mean "I notice you're not on every day, is there a faster route than this one that I'm missing?"

Like everyone said, it's not what you're talking about that is important...it's initiating a conversation. Sincerity shows. Just be yourself. She'll get to know it eventually anyway, right? Might as well make her first impression of you...well, you.

__________________
Though I am different from you,
We were born involved in one another.

For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.

Complete surrender should not just come at moments in which one faces overwhelming odds, but in the calm when it seems one is personally in complete control of one's life.

Where is the peanut emoticon?

Although I'm sure WI considers me part of the peanut gallery, I could never consider him shy.


Sometimes getting to know someone slowly is great, too.


This is not to say I have a crush on WI! I'm just saying that sometimes wonderful facets of a person are discovered after many conversations.