Hi guys I need some help. I'm sorry if theres alot of typos I've now been drinking because of the problem. I suppose I'd best give a little history first. I have been with my partner fpr many years and we haver a 15 year old daughter, the unusual thing is that we don't liver together. She still lives with her parents and I have had to move back to mine after having a place of my own.

Basically what happen is that my daughter wehilst out with me and S/O at amy friends started to be a tyopical teemnager and a real pain in the arse. I ttied to stop her and she just got worse so we had to leave my friends. She then started to threaten all sorts of thing against me - sucjh as setting the social services on me and that sort of thing. SAhe then once we got to my home ran off to make her way home, I was willing to let her do this but my partner wanted to go after her which I did. Once we caught her up she was talking on her mobile to someone - I don't knowe who but i think ity was her grandmother. I tried to get her in the car to take her home but she ran off again and at the piont I could say I lost it which I admit was not good. I was shouting at her to get in the car but she wouldn't, her granddad the appeared and started to interfear amnd I alomost decked him. This ahas been building up fopr a while and I know the next time I see him I will probably deck him as soon as I see him. I still care for samantha'd mother but I can no longer stand her family I don't know waht to do.

__________________
What is life?
If not an excuse for death,
and what is death,
if not an escape from life?

just so you knowe I'm not a viloent chap normally - I will walk away rather have a confrontation.

__________________
What is life?
If not an excuse for death,
and what is death,
if not an escape from life?

1) sleep it off
2) drinking because of problems only begats more problems
3) set an example for your daughter and take the high road

Trust me, you would not be the first person to ever yell at a teenager. Your family dynamics make situations that are routine more difficult. Call a family meeting, seek mediation or counseling if there are problems that can not be work out through compromise.

__________________

The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas

I'm just so angry that its eating me up - and thats before I strted drinking. In tfact the drink has stopped me doing something stupid - last year I had a breakdown and I know if I had been alone tonight I would have started cutting myself again which is bad.

__________________
What is life?
If not an excuse for death,
and what is death,
if not an escape from life?

Then it's time to seek some professional help. If you are to the point where you need something like alcohol to quiet the demons then you need to get some healthier coping skills to handle your anger.

__________________

The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas

Drink isn't a usual refuge for me in fact its very unusual. I normally only drink a couple of beers a month if than at most, tonight I just needed something to help releive the tension I was feeling as I am a nosmoker beesr seemed to be the best option.

__________________
What is life?
If not an excuse for death,
and what is death,
if not an escape from life?

((((musketeer)))) but you were looking for something to stop you from cutting yourself. That is good!! But you need coping skills to help you find better choices than alcohol to mellow you out. I am glad you stopped before you harmed someone.

__________________

The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas

drink.. and emotional discontent are such a bad combination (i.e. my new years eve thread).

The teen years are rough... on everyone involved. I would suggest you gathering ALL interested parties together (when EVERYONE is sober) and deal with this as rational adults. In order to get through to your daughter... ALL of you have to present to her a united front (no matter how ununited you might actually be).

HUGS

The drinking will not help mate.

__________________
Half of a set :halo:

Thanks guys - I'll let you know how things go.

__________________
What is life?
If not an excuse for death,
and what is death,
if not an escape from life?

((((musketeer))))) Please heed the well chosen/caring advice above!

And......as to your daughter calling social services on you..........my experience with that is this.....

Those that NEED to call them and SHOULD call them at any expense (the truly abused child)....never threaten this notion (aloud) for real fear of retaliation from their abuser! Those who continually threaten to call "the authorities"....with little or no knowledge of what abuse actually is.....should be taken aside and shown case records of children who are truly abused. The horrors of child abuse are so seperate and dinstinctive from disipline.....there can be no mistake! That children today misuse the system against their parents is so reprehensible I could scream!

Every child knows this threat stikes up some emotion in their parent. How bout turning the tables? Tell her.....ok....call the authorities and we'll sit down and discuss the laws. The law says that as your parent I have to provide you with a home and clothing and schooling until you are 18 or graduate or quit at age of consent. So, I'll let you stay here and they won't have to take you away....but you can only use your bedroom for sleeping....with no TV....no phone.....no stereo.....no computer. You can use the bathroom and shower facilities for X amount of time per day! I'll feed you three meals per day.....no more, no less. I am also required to give you clothing......so you can now shop at "GoodWill" (second-hand stores) and forget those $200.00 shoes you NEED and will die if you can't have.....I'm only required to shoe you....not make you the most popular teen on earth......so you can wear these $12.00 sneakers I got at the five and dime! As to school.....you can stay where you are now or, as a newly embarrassed teen (said clothing and shoes) who is a self proclaimed abused teen, you can go to a school for troubled children who need 24/7 psychiatric attention. Your choice! But yes.....indeed.......let's call the authorities....and we'll establish rules and follow laws as they are set forth! Go get me the phone honey!

Hey! Just a thought!

__________________
Minds are like parachutes. They only work when they are open.

~Thomas Dewar~

And it is Lixy's above post that is a great example of what a wonderful person she is... LOL... I couldn't (and wouldn't) have said it any better.

Oops!

*jumps off the soapbox*

Now I need a drink! LOL.......geezzzzzz......sorry bout that but I got passionate!

Now I have this song going through my head......

"Why can't they be like we were....perfect in every way! What's the matter with kids TODAY?????"

*straightens up the silver painted hanger (faux halo) and leaves the thread*

__________________
Minds are like parachutes. They only work when they are open.

~Thomas Dewar~

I have nothing to add to the advice given above....... just wanted to say, I hope things work out for you!

(btw..... drink absolutely DOESN'T help...... guess how I know?!?! ~ and it ain't cos I'm a Psych Nurse!)

DM

__________________
The selfish, they're all standing in line
Faithing and hoping to buy themselves time
Me, I figure as each breath goes by
I only own my mind

Thanks Lixy - I have done the "ok lets go to see the social services thing" and yes as soon as we got out side she wanted to tell them when it suited her. And as for the rest becaue I don't live with her and her mother I can't unfortunatly do that, even though I know it would her the world of good just to see how well she is actually treated.

Thanks again to everyone for their helpful postings, as many of you know the darkness can sometimes seem to extinguish all light but by being postive i will soon reach and pass the point I was at before last night.

__________________
What is life?
If not an excuse for death,
and what is death,
if not an escape from life?