Y'all get out the hankies, this'n made me cry. LOL


The Redneck Love Poem



Collards is green, my dog's name is Blue
And I'm so lucky to have a sweet thang like you.
Yore hair is like corn silk a-flapping in the breeze.
Softer than Blue's and without all them fleas.

You move like the bass, which excite me in May.
You ain't got no scales but I luv you anyway.
Yo're as satisfy'n as okry jist a-fry'n in the pan.
Yo're as fragrant as "snuff" right out of the can.

You have some'a yore teeth, for which I am proud;
I hold my head high when we're in a crowd.
On special occasions, when you shave under yore arms,
Well, I'm in hawg heaven, and awed by yore charms.

Still them fellers at work, they all want to know,
What I did to deserve such a purdy, young doe.
Like a good roll of duct tape, yo're there fer yore man,
To patch up life's troubles and fix what you can.

Yo're as cute as a junebug a-buzzin' overhead.
You ain't mean like those far ants I found in my bed.
Cut from the best cloth like a plaid flannel shirt,
You spark up my life more than a fresh load of dirt.

When you hold me real tight like a padded gunrack,
My life is complete; Ain't nuttin' I lack.
Yore complexion, it's perfection, like the best vinyl sidin'.
Despite all the years, yore age, it keeps hidin'.

Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie with a RC cold drank,
We go together like a skunk goes with stank.
Some men, they buy chocolate for Valentine's Day;
They git it at Wal-Mart, it's romantic that way.

Some men git roses on that special day
From the cooler at Kroger. That's impressive," I say.
Some men buy fine diamonds from a flea market booth.
"Diamonds are forever," they explain, suave and couth.

But for this man, honey, these won't do.
Cause yor'e too special, you sweet thang you.
I got you a gift, without taste nor odor,
More useful than diamonds......IT'S A NEW TROLL'N MOTOR!!

__________________
As to marriage or celibacy, let a man take which course he will. He will be sure to repent - Socrates

Love is not looking in each other's eyes, but looking together in the same direction - Antoine De Saint-Exupery

Yaahoo that was prudy.I shor like to bring ma specul wife-sister-cousin-daughter to the out doors tables at the local pork 'n beer and listen to them wonderin banjo players or give her a dime fer the jute box.How romanteek.

__________________
Sex is one of nine reasons for reincarnation.The other eight are unimportant...Henry Miller

Hukt ahn foniks werkt fur me!!

Dayuuuum sounds like someone I know!!!!!! LMAO

__________________
I am here for only a short time on this earth. My goal is to make everyone I see smile if only for a moment.

*sniffle*

*Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa*

I'm a sucker for potetree!

db........may I have a tissue? *sniffle*

__________________
Minds are like parachutes. They only work when they are open.

~Thomas Dewar~

Omg! I know places where these kind of people live!

__________________
Happiness is Bunny Shaped

My Stories:One Hot July Allison's Seduction Olivia's Journey

Ah, the sound of oral music.

Bill Shakespeare's spewing 'cos he didn't write that one.

More?

__________________
Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating

BigBear57---I hope that you don't mind,but I just copied your poem & sent it(via e-mail)to my wife at work.We have been exchanging Redneck things for years.Those & Blonde Jokes.I'm
Blonde & both of our daughters are!You could say that it's sort of
a tradition! Irish

__________________
Irish---Better to be dead & cool,then alive & uncool!
(Harley Davidson & the Marlboro Man)

Hot damn! I taint hurd nuttin so nice since dey tuk da Beverin' Hillbillies off de picky tube. Big bar, ya dun good.

Um.....db? About these tissues you lent me? Um.......they seem to be ABCO tissues hun! Got a fresher one? Like......one straight outta the box please??????

LMAO!

*hugs*

























ABCO=Already Been Cum On















*runs outta the thread*

__________________
Minds are like parachutes. They only work when they are open.

~Thomas Dewar~

Shuky durn, Miss Lixy. I juz din wanna be wastin' da ol' ones. Specy since dem had senmenal valu frum when I wuz lookin at your piczies. :lust:

Yu hav sum newins right here, mamm!

Azaleas is pank and
Daisies is yeller
Y'all done brung a smile
to this here feller
roses smell purty and
the outhouse is stanky
I writ this here pome
so I could say thanky

__________________
As to marriage or celibacy, let a man take which course he will. He will be sure to repent - Socrates

Love is not looking in each other's eyes, but looking together in the same direction - Antoine De Saint-Exupery

The original one you posted at the start is great!! I needed a good laugh.

But BigBear the little 'thanky' note you wrote is even better!! I love it. roflmao

Thanks for both of them.
teddy

LORD,HELP THESE PEOPLE....

__________________
DAMN, YOU ARE A SEXY ONE-skipthisone

I beleive in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve, and I beleive in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days. Kevin Costner/Bull Duram

"Your body as well as mine has needs. This is juat a little foreplay to highten our desire for each other. If we play out the game of love to it's natural conclusion, you'll experience fulfillment. Give yourself up to me and I'll guide you along the path to pareadise. Together we will be like fire and ice, love and hate, life and death." Virginia Henley

WANTED: a moment when you kiss someone and eveything around you becomes hazy. And the only thing in focus is you and this person and you relize that he is the only person your suppose to kiss for the rest of your life. And for one moment you get this amazing gift. You want to laugh and you want to cry. Cause you feel so lucky that you found it and so scared it will all go away at the same time.

LOL@txgrneyes. Thanks for the good wishes.