My GF and I broke up about a month ago, but there are some questions I have that I am hoping for some direction on before I think about tackling a new relationship.

She moved with me to a *VERY* far away country. Once we arrived she started drinking every day. Until she left my entire salary was being spent each month. We started having a lot of fights about money. I was trying to save some, she would argue about the price of tea (seriously!).

Well, here on the TV there are some porn channels late at night. While flipping through one evening I found the channels. She was instantly angry with me. She was going on about how morally wrong pornography was, how it made you stupid, and how much she hated it.

This bothered me as she liked to read really pornographic books. One in particular is called Behind the Door and has all kinds of scenes like group sex, rape, etc. This she is fine with because she calls it "erotica", but it is basically the same without the actual people.

We had discussed trying a threesome, she had done FFM many times with her best friend (including with the boyfriend before me), and I have tried MMF. When we first started together she would tell me about her sleeping with her best friend while we were having sex. About the same period of time she was on her porn ranting, she was angry with me for having the want to try a threesome with another girl. Nothing could be said, of course, about her want of having a threesome with another guy.

Then started the abuse, which led to her going back home. When she was really drunk she would threaten me with bottles, knives. Just all kinds of psychotic behavour.

What would have made her so anit-porn considering her like for hard-erotic literature and her "previous" sexual openness?

Why would she have about-faced on the threesome issues except for her own desires?

Thanks in advance.

Sometimes people condemn the very behavior they desire in a way to "convince" them selves that they should refrain. The phrase "me thinks she doth protest too much" seems to aply to your ex! Just be grateful she is an ex. Move on........we aren't all quite so psychotic! Well I am but the rest aren't

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Sounds like someone you are better off far away from.

She has challenges she needs to meet before she is emotionally

fit for a full sharing relationship.

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Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating

You've heard of the "double standard"? This is as clear an example as I've seen...don't worry about your sanity here, you're looking for reasonable explanations for an unreasonable person's behavior...

Not to mention a case of Instant Asshole(tm)
...just add alcohol...

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If the theory does not conform to the facts, then the facts must be discarded.

No good deed ever goes unpunished

Never argue with an idiot. He'll drag you down to his level, & beat you with experience.

the wonders of social programming...