I'm sure this subject has been breached before, but here goes..Any advice on dealing with your wife/girlfriend having an affair?...This is literally killing me.........

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Am I waking to this magic, Am I seeing all is Human...All is Human after all..- Jon Anderson

Hugs Justin...

I can only suggest that you begin communicating with her... and do alot of soul searching..

Right now I'm a f&%cking wreck......

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Am I waking to this magic, Am I seeing all is Human...All is Human after all..- Jon Anderson

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Justin,

Confront her about it, then pull yourself together.

I havea strict policy on cheating in a relationship. Cheating on your partner is the worst way to disresepct your partner and I wil never do it. I also refuse to date anyone I know who has a history of cheating and I will not sleep with anyone behind their significant others back. Oh sure I will do it in a heartbeat if they are comfortable with it, but never behind the S/O's back.

It does now matter the sex of the person invovled. Cheating is cheating. I say this because a lot of people will not consider a bisexual encounter bhind their boyfriend's back as cheating.

Both times I have been cheated on it was the girl sleeping with another girl an she though nothing was wrong. The first time was with a girl that was little more than a fuck buddy, but she lied to me about it and a ex girlfriend who was working to sabotage all my subsequent relationships was the person she ran off with. I dumped the girl, broke off all ties to the ex-girlfriend and well in retrospect I have never been happier.

The second time was when my ex-fiancee was sleeping with a girl who lived closer to her and was a friend since childhood. She at least told me that her firen was bi and had a crush on her and she asked if it was OK. I gave permission, but only under the stipulation that it be a threesome or I could watch or you take pictures, but I want this girl to know it is just sex and nothing else. My ex had no intentions of anything more than sex, she went ahad and did it, but her firend would not let her take picture, let me watch or join in becuase she felt uncomfortable with that. I told my exI need to meet this girl in person and we could all talk. I told her I trust her and she will do the right thing. Well the next week she did it again and this time another life long friend watched. I was furious and said someone will get hurt and it won't be me. Sure enough my fiancee and her had a talk, and well then the girl got all amd and said I was jsut jelous and a loser. I went down there and talked to the girl. I told her how much I loved my fiancee and sure enough that stopped the whole lesbian fling.

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Well sir that seems to be someone else's problem.

You'll have to talk about it and see what direction the relationship could go from there. Good luck, my friend.

hope things work out for you.
When my ex cheated on me, I was more hurt by the emotional cheating than the physical.
I also learned that a broken heart is a physical pain too~~~~devastating~~~~~~~~~~time helps to heal the hurt.
The scars may still be with me, but I was lucky enough to find Dm who is the sweetest guy in my world!
((((((((((HUGS))))))))))

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Don't pet the sweaty things!!!!

Thank you..Pixie People are the best!

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Am I waking to this magic, Am I seeing all is Human...All is Human after all..- Jon Anderson

Justin (((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))) i know its never easy when it happens and its never a good idea to do. all i can say is yall need to talk. if u luv her and she luvs u yall can work tho it. but u gotta be willing to have all the painfull conversations that will come frm talking. ive been tempted to cheat on my hubby so many times, usually after a fight or when hes been so involed w work that im gettin ignored alot. the only reason i havnt has been i cant justify an affair just because im attention greedy and i dont want to see his face when he finds out. it wud break me , just htat face relizing whats been happening. i told him once that i was tempted and told him the reasoning behind it , that i was lonley and wanted to feel wanted again. it helped us work tho before nething cud happen and he started payin more attention but it was a painfull convo that i really didnt want to have but knew if i didnt i wud. i guess my point is talk. if yall clam up around each other get a 3rd party involved , counsler, clergy, close friend that neutral (although friends are rarly neutral. ) the 3rd parties help alot, they let u put things in perspective and keep the fighting downso u can actually talk. i do hope things get better , just let her know u luv her still. cuz im sure she is as torn up as u are. i am when i just think about it.

Guess I was wrong!

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Don't pet the sweaty things!!!!

*hug Justin*

I can't say anything that hasn't been said already; you gotta confront her about it, man.

Of course, I'm the really forgiving type and would probably give her another shot...but your punishment is up to you, if you choose to do one at all.

Don't know if "punishment" is quite the right sentiment.

it won't work unless there is committment both implied and actual to make things work.

She knows your feelings and what is not acceptable to you so she either values the relationship with you so much she does what is needed to mend the rift or she doesnt.

life can be a bugger best of luck mate

Justin---When I was younger,I used to get,extremely,jealous,&
I now realise,that it-"Takes two,to Tango."If,the person,that you
care about was forced,that is a different story.Otherwise,tho you probably,don't want to hear it,possibly,your relationship,just wasn't meant to be! Irish

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Irish---Better to be dead & cool,then alive & uncool!
(Harley Davidson & the Marlboro Man)

Hehe you're right ^^; My way with words isn't so good.

Thanks again...

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Am I waking to this magic, Am I seeing all is Human...All is Human after all..- Jon Anderson