This one reminds me of an ex-girlfriend

I Care by Al Bundy

When hooters jiggle around and I find nickels on the ground I care.
When a Mustang engine purrs and the bathroom is not hers I care.
When the pitcher's on the mound and the wife is underground I care.
But when I've been playing this for days I will kill anyone who stays. I swear!

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It takes a gutless mouse to play only when the cat's away.

No love, no friendship, can cross the path of our destiny without leaving some mark on it forever. ~~ Francois Mocuriac

Confucius say, "He who masturbate into cash register come into money."

An optimist looks at the glass and says it's half full. A pessimist looks at the glass and says it's half empty. A Cubs fan looks at the glass and says, "When's it gonna spill?"

Deus Impetitio Esuritori Nullus