This made me laugh!!!

http://www.rawbw.com/~c_abbott/Penis/

And a very true tale it is at that.

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It takes a gutless mouse to play only when the cat's away.

No love, no friendship, can cross the path of our destiny without leaving some mark on it forever. ~~ Francois Mocuriac

Confucius say, "He who masturbate into cash register come into money."

An optimist looks at the glass and says it's half full. A pessimist looks at the glass and says it's half empty. A Cubs fan looks at the glass and says, "When's it gonna spill?"

Deus Impetitio Esuritori Nullus

The kids singing in Church this morning

Abner the cat going wild on the porch when I let a big fat mooth in.

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it's only kinky the first time

it's not the orgasm but getting there thats fun

a shot in the bush is worth two in the hand

whip me, beat me, tie me up, break my arm, but please don't break my heart

"The trouble with the world is that the stupid people are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt" -Bertrand Russell

my hubby and daughter giving me their mothers day gifts and acting all sly..

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Frankly my dear i don't give a damn *Rhett Butler to Scarlett O'hara."


"Tomorrow is another day" Scarlette O'hara monologue..

socrates last words.. " i drank what?!"

Joking with co-workers about our crazy happy weekends.

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Life is too short not to love and be loved....preferably multiple times in one night.

I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them. ~ Jay McInerney

Those "loveheart" sweets. And the theory that they're messages from god, giving you a little morale boost for the day. I offered my friend a few over the course of the day and every time she got either, "hot lips" or "lush lips", so god's obviously pleased with his handiwork. She does have gorgeous lips.

Last night as I was cleaning...I decided to hide the contents of the sex toy drawer so that my guests from Israel don't accidentally run into them. I put all of them in a bag and shoved the bag in the back of the sink cabinet....and started to walk away....


....only to hear vibrating noises coming from the bottom of the sink!

The toys were unhappy about being relegated to a cabinet. I had to dig them out, take out all the batteries, and then put them back.


It seemed funny at the time.

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Life is too short not to love and be loved....preferably multiple times in one night.

I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them. ~ Jay McInerney

I'm thinking ^^^ was getting her pipes cleaned.

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Though I am different from you,
We were born involved in one another.

For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.

Complete surrender should not just come at moments in which one faces overwhelming odds, but in the calm when it seems one is personally in complete control of one's life.

I have more pleasurable ways of getting my pipes cleaned. I've located a special snake that does the job nicely.


BTW - I am always looking for more effective means, so if you have ideas please PM me.

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Life is too short not to love and be loved....preferably multiple times in one night.

I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them. ~ Jay McInerney

Hmmm...this sounds like a trap.

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Though I am different from you,
We were born involved in one another.

For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.

Complete surrender should not just come at moments in which one faces overwhelming odds, but in the calm when it seems one is personally in complete control of one's life.

PM PM PM PM PM PM PM PM

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that's much too subtle^^^





the fart noises that the windex bottle made which sent my boy to the floor in a fit of giggles.

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Trees give peace to the souls of men * Nora Waln

The forest would be very quiet if no other birds sang than those who sing the best * Henry van Dyke

some fairly sordid tales, rambles, and anecdotes
Hypothetically Speaking * Something More * Cammy Interrupted * An Experimental Vacation * Masked * so..damn..hot * Thank You * My toy, his idea * no.19 Maple Lane * I Have A Surprise For You * Yesterday * In a Quiet Kitchen * help me decide * untitled prose * more untitled prose

Only those peeps^^^^^^^^^. Nothing in my day was funny.

Me again...I crack myself up.


I'm pretty sure my secretary is standing by with a nice white dinner jacket. I don't think she's very good at estimating sizes though. This one has really long sleeves.

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Though I am different from you,
We were born involved in one another.

For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.

Complete surrender should not just come at moments in which one faces overwhelming odds, but in the calm when it seems one is personally in complete control of one's life.