I just posted a long post here but to be honest sometimes the best advice you can give someone with a broken heart especially when you don't really know them is to simply say I am sorry and mean it genuinely. I am sorry you find yourself in this situation. I dont know you well enough to give advice and so will simply wish you better times ahead with easier decisions....

Most of all I wish you gentler warmer days ahead. Days filled at least with loving friends and family around you. Days where you are able to see the beauty and positive qualities you as a person have and can be ready for hopefuly the right person in your life. Good luck with your healing process and sincere hugs here for you.

/bow

Zeph

AV- I am so sorry honey, to hear about your situation. I know how horrible a heartache can be, and I'm sorry you're having to endure it now.

I can't give you any advice but I can share a tiny bit of experience with you. I've lived for 49 years and had my share of hurts, disappointments, bullshit. There were times that I felt sure I wouldn't be able to handle it, didn't have the inner resources, the well was just too empty...

But I can honestly say that at some later point, I was able to look back at that hurtful experience and see that I was better off now for not being in the same boat I was in at the time... make sense? I know it sounds like a load of crap to you right now, it would to me too... but please hang in there and one of these days you'll see what I mean.

Also... AV? I agree that if you feel this man is "it", what have you got to lose by squaring your shoulders and laying your cards on the table? If it's worth having, it's worth fighting damn hard for!


((((AV))))

__________________
Dear Lord, I pray for wisdom to understand my man, love to forgive him, and patience for his moods. Because Lord, if I pray for strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN


It's no trick loving somebody at their best. Love is loving them at their worst.
~Tom Stoppard~


It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married.
~George Burns~


As bad as I am, I'm proud of the fact that I'm worse than I seem.
~A. DiFranco~

I don't know you very well AV - but we all have at one time or another been through what you are right now. Know that we are there for you and that you have loads of friends here you can talk with. I hesitated posting a reply for this thread only because we don't know each other - but felt compelled today to let you know you are in our thoughts.

Hey girlfriend, where you at? havn't heard from you in a couple days


Speak up and let us know how you are doing.

We care about you!!

I appreciate all the support from each and every one of you. I am doing better than I was but I am still hopelessly in love with him. I just can't shake the feeling that he is "the one" for me. I know that that probably scares him but I am willing to give him all the time that he needs to be sure about me. I can understand that settling down with a person could be very overwhelming when that person isn't quite sure what they want out of life just yet. I will give him all the time in the world if need be. I also know that some people do not have the greatest opinion of him. That's ok as well. How they see him is different from how I see him. He is, overall, everything that I've wanted in a guy. We all have our ups and downs, all have our own battles to fight (sometimes with even ourselves), are not always understood by everyone, and not always realize what we need/want out of life to ensure our happiness. I've learned some things from this relationship. Some might not sound very good but here's what I've learned:

1. It's ok to be somewhat selfish. You gotta find what makes you happy and stick with it.
2. Compromise should not come from just one side.
3. Speaking your mind can be good or bad but the truth is always the best option.
4. Sometimes, hope is the only thing we have and it is worth keeping whether things pan out or not.
5. When you are really in love, you'll know it and not want to let go of it.
6. The small things in life really do matter just as much as the bigger things.
7. Doubt can be a murderer.
8. A lot can be said in a smile and even more can be said in tears.
9. Anything worth putting your heart into is worth fighting for.
10. Obsession only leads to more insecurity and worry.
11. Worry will not make you live any longer.

__________________
"...but his evaluation of my vampiric reputation had me begging for salvation ALL night long!"

My Stories and Poems
Wake Up, My Darling With Him Black The Incubus The Succubus Return of the Succubus Be My Dom The Vampiress The Seductress Condolances, My Vampire and Romance of the Virgin Master...or Pet? Part I Master....Or Pet? Part II Master...Or Pet? Part III (End of the Trilogy) When She Comes An Experiment In Her Blood The "Horseshoe" William and Camilla Cold Water Sit His First... Her Hunger You May Enter (Me) The Glory of Magdalena The Drive Home Dreaming of a Stranger Night
Just Like That The Taste The Pool of Pleasure Room 207 Park and Ride Til Death An Invitation Movie Night Sister's Shower


My Other Personalities
Blood Princess
Crown of Ivy

whoo! son you have got some balls. what are you doing coming in here on your first post and calling people out. That's asking for trouble.

1) Apparantly, you have some issues with mr. wanderingsoul. that's fine, no body says you have to like everybody. But I find it a little ironic that you're trashing him going on and on about how he doesn't know you all the while, YOU DON'T KNOW HIM EITHER. You have spent no more time with him than he has with you. Both of you are passing judgement and it makes you both look like Deal with that shit in PM's - that's why we have them.

2) Regarding your girl AV. Only one post on here has been attacking you, and we've discussed that in part 1. Everyone else has been trying to build up the girl that you say you are in love with. So don't come on here with an attitude when we are just trying to help. No one is cutting on you, no one is dogging you out, you don't need to get defensive. In fact, the other person you called out said in a previous post that you actually aren't too bad of a guy. We aren't interested in hurting you, we're interested in helping her. Or to paraphrase another Pixie - she is our priority, you are not. At least you weren't before you became a member.

3) and speaking of KAELYNN (and girlfriend, listen up, because I'm going to thump your nose a little here, too). You two apparantly don't get along. I've got some firthand experience with situations like this. The bottom line is that the two of you have got to be at least courteous to one another. No exceptions, no excuses. If you can't handle being courteous, then simply don't be around one another. But the fact is, the more you two bicker ans squabble, the more difficult you make life for AV. Do not name call, do not trash each other in public (what you do in private it your business) and do not bitch to her about how awful the other one is. That's why you have girlfriends and guyfriends. Bitch to them about it.

4) and 4, just to satisfy my own curiosity.
There is anothe member, qwerty, that has been very active in this thread. I suspect, MR. AV Man, that this is another alias for you, or it is someone you know well working for you. I could be wrong. But this motherfucker seems to have a very indepth knowledge of your situation and is all to eager to provide advice. And everytime, his advice is geared toward getting you and AV back together, or building you up. so I'm just curious - not passing judgement not pointing fingers. ARe you behind him?

Ok, so I've officially stuck my nose in where it doesn't belong, but i don't regret it. I think we are all working toward a common goal, and that is AV's ultimate happiness. However, SHE is the one who has to decide what makes her happy. The best thing you can do for right now is to back off and let her take the time that she needs to get herself together. That means no phone calls, emails, internet conversations and NO DEFENDING YOURSELF ON MESSAGE BOARDS YOU KNOW SHE READS! Let her contact you. I know it's hard, but it's for the best.

I hope I've managed to do this adult-like. If you're pissed, feel free to respond, preferably in PM's.

Sincerely,

LAW

P.S. one more thing. Please do not call my girl Kaelynn a slut in public again. I will not be as nice about it next time.

I'll make this short.

Every comment I made about wanderingsoul and Kaelynn is fact.

Kaelynn's comments and attacks are mostly offline.

AV is the one to contact me first every time we talk. She also read and approved me posting my post before I submitted it.

qwerty has been a member since Sep 2003. I didn't even know AV back then... how could I be a member of a site she introduced me to before I knew of it?

OhioGuy/AV'sMan~ since you are brand spanking new I'm going to make sure you understand that this is a no flame forum. I understand you are upset because advice was given to AV you don't think features you in a favorable light but flaming, name calling and disrespect will not be tolerated. When this thread was posted, you were not a member and so the members here posted regarding a stranger. You joined shortly after and while I can understand your feelings. Your post is inapropriate. Obviously this drama is personal and should be taken to PMs or messengers.

__________________

The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas

I'll take Lilith for the WIN! You get 'em boss!


this is in no way mean to perpetuate drama - IT'S A JOKE!

Madame Lil rules, but I'm gaining more and more respect for LAW.. ain't she a peach?

__________________
As to marriage or celibacy, let a man take which course he will. He will be sure to repent - Socrates

Love is not looking in each other's eyes, but looking together in the same direction - Antoine De Saint-Exupery

I'm sorry for all the turmoil, both here at Pixie's and to everyone that I know personally. Trying to appease everyone is obviously not an option despite my best efforts. I've decided that I will step back and not play a ref in whatever battle is going on between Kaelynn and AV's Man. Whatever feud they have to settle they will have to do on their own. I agree with the "stop bitching about the other" thing. I feel that keeping everyone separate in both physical presence and words is the best way to go. I don't mind when people speak their mind because that is a right everyone should have. Everyone also has to like or dislike whoever they want...it's called freedom of choice. Now, even though some choices are made, they don't always need to be amplified and problems needs to be dealt with appropriately. Words are words, truth is truth and both are different to everyone. Things are always more difficult when emotions get added into the mix. He was right...I do always IM him first. As I've said before, I care about him and love him deeply.

What I am very glad about is that none of you told me to "control him." I've heard that before. Why should I control anybody at all? He is his own person and I should not be responsible for making sure he takes all his naps on time, eats a well balanced diet every day, or chew his food 50 times before swallowing.

What I am confused about is why most of you would like for me to either just stop talking to him for a while or to block him out of my life completely. If I blocked him out totally, that would resolve nothing and all my hopes get crushed. I am flattered that you are all looking for my to be happy, I really am. I also know that I am the only one that will be able to find that happiness. So I thank you all for your words of comfort and understanding.

Whatever choices we make in life are, no doubt, made because we believe they will make us happy (whether that be in the long run or just for the moment). Not all the choices that we make are right....we're human, we're going to mess up. It's when we mess up and don't learn anything from it that causes us major problems.

I will also stick to the old addage of "Let he who has not sinned cast the first stone." It's a simple message and one worth taking to heart.

__________________
"...but his evaluation of my vampiric reputation had me begging for salvation ALL night long!"

My Stories and Poems
Wake Up, My Darling With Him Black The Incubus The Succubus Return of the Succubus Be My Dom The Vampiress The Seductress Condolances, My Vampire and Romance of the Virgin Master...or Pet? Part I Master....Or Pet? Part II Master...Or Pet? Part III (End of the Trilogy) When She Comes An Experiment In Her Blood The "Horseshoe" William and Camilla Cold Water Sit His First... Her Hunger You May Enter (Me) The Glory of Magdalena The Drive Home Dreaming of a Stranger Night
Just Like That The Taste The Pool of Pleasure Room 207 Park and Ride Til Death An Invitation Movie Night Sister's Shower


My Other Personalities
Blood Princess
Crown of Ivy

You guys were right...he was also qwerty. He told me that he stole the account (although he claimed that it was an account that hadn't been used in a while). Nonetheless, he is still a jerk but you Pixie's are awesome!

__________________
Your body is the only thing you can claim as your own.

Forgive first, then maybe forget.

Story: Oh Daddy

yo hotty,get your sweet arse out here to aus. & i promise you"ll forget all about whatever his name is/was.
sincerely
mynadsonurchin
prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrrrrrrr