Q: What do you call a virgin on a waterbed?
A: A cherry float.

Q: What's the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?
A: 1 U.S. leader

Q: What did the sign on the door of the whorehouse say?
A: Beat it - we're closed.

Q: Why do walruses go to Tupperware parties?
A: To find a tight seal.

Q: What's the difference between sin and shame?
A: It is a sin to put it in, but it's a shame to pull it out.

Q: What's the speed limit of sex?
A: 68; at 69 you have to turn around.

Q: Why did Raggedy Ann get thrown out of the toy box?
A: She kept sitting on Pinocchio's face, and moaning, "Lie to me!"

Q: Why is air a lot like sex?
A: Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any.

Q: If there is H2O on the inside of a fire hydrant, what is on the outside?
A: K9P.

Q: What's another name for pickled bread?
A: Dill-dough.

Q: Why are Monica Lewinsky's cheeks so puffy?
A: She's withholding evidence.

Q: What's the difference between light and hard?
A: You can sleep with a light on.

Q: Why is sex like a bridge game?
A: You don't need a partner if you have a good hand.

Q: What's the height of conceit?
A: Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.

Q: What's the definition of macho?
A: Jogging home from your own vasectomy.

Q: What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common?
A: Their balls are just for decoration.

Q: Why don't blind people like to sky dive?
A: Because it scares the hell out of the dog.



And YES... I am amusing myself tonight LOL