I am completely mystified over this situation. If anybody can shed a little light, I sure would appreciate it.

As some of you know, I'm recently seperated and slowly but surely getting back into dating again. I'm not really interested in finding that second Mr. Right (maybe a Mr. Rightnow, but that's about the limit of me)..... still too many personal issues coming out of such a destuctive marriage. And it seems like everybody I go out with (with the exception of one married guy who sorta neglected to mention that he was married.... uh huh, adios to that one ---- i just don't need the drama)....anyway, all the rest seem to want a commitment. I try as hard as I can to explain how I feel and what I'm looking for...... just some friendship.....someone to go out and have some fun with....and then go home and have some better fun with.....and that's really it. Why after a few dates, have they all gotten so clingy? It just seems that each one has wound up wanting to put their leash on my neck ( and i don't mean the fun kind) or tattoo their name on my ass. Can someone explain this to me? I haven't met one shallow one in the bunch.

Maybe I could even understand it if I were as drop dead gorgeous as some of our pixie ladies like IWM and CGT, but I'm not. (Oh, I'm not downing myself, I'm just a realist) One of my best buds is male and his take on it is, that it's because I'm so overtly sexual and every man wants one like that. Says he'd even apply for the position if he weren't married. (See? All the good ones are taken!!!) One of the girls I work with says she thinks it's because I have such an independant, kick-ass-and-take-names-later kinda attitude....like they have to conquer me or sumpin. Have times changed that much while I was trapped in that dungeon of a marriage? Where oh where are all the guys wanting no strings attached?

And yes, to those who understand the issues I'm working thru, I'm not saying this is a forever way of thinking. It's just best for me for right now and best for whoever I'm with.....it just seems wrong of me to drag into a relationship all the crap that my own personal ex-asshole deposited between and betwixt my ears until i've sorted and gotten it either organized or thrown away.

Thanks for listening.