Subject: ATHLETES >Date: Sun, 5 Oct 2003 08:56:07 EDT > >Why Athletes Can't
(Shouldn't) Have Real Jobs > > 1. Chicago Cubs outfielder Andre Dawson on
being a role model: "I >wan' all dem kids to do what I do, to look up to me.
I wan' all >the kids to copulate me." > > 2. New Orleans Saint RB George
Rogers when asked about the >upcoming season: "I want to rush for 1,000 or
1,500 yards, >whichever comes first." > > 3. And, upon hearing Joe Jacobi of
the 'Skins say: "I'd run over >my own mother to win the Super Bowl, "Matt
Millen of the Raiders >said: "To win,I'd run over Joe's Mom, too." > > 4.
Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver, on his coach, John > Jenkins:
"He treats us like men. He lets us wear earrings." > > 5. Football
commentator and former player Joe Theismann, >1996: "Nobody in football
should be called a genius. A genius is a >guy like Norman Einstein." > > 6.
Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh: "I'm > going to
graduate on time, no matter how long it takes." (now >that is beautiful) > >
7. Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach: "You guys line >up
alphabetically by height." And, "You guys pair up in groups of >three, and
then line up in a circle." > > 8. Boxing promoter Dan Duva on Mike Tyson
going to prison: "Why >would anyone expect him to come out smarter? He went
to prison for >three years, not Princeton." > > 9. Stu Grimson, Chicago
Blackhawks left wing, explaining why he >keeps a color photo of himself
above his locker: "That's so when I >forget how to spell my name, I can
still find my clothes." > > 10. Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the
Spartan training >regime of heavyweight Andrew Golota: "He's a guy who gets
up at >six o'clock in the morning regardless of what time it is." > > 11.
Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player, >explaining to Coach
Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at >practice: "My sister's expecting a
baby, and I don't know if I'm >going to be an uncle or an aunt." (I wonder
if his IQ ever hit >room temperature in January) > > 12. Frank Layden, Utah
Jazz president, on a former player: "I >told him, 'Son, what is it with you?
Is it ignorance or apathy?' >He said, 'Coach,I don't know and I don't
care.'" > > 13. Shelby Metcalf, basketball coach at Texas A&M, recounting
>what he told a player who received four F's and one D: "Son, looks >to me
like you're spending too much time on one subject." > > 14. Amarillo High
School and Oiler coach Bum Phillips when asked >by Bob Costas why he takes
his wife on all the road trips, > Phillips responded: "Because she is too
damn ugly to kiss good- >bye." > > > > >

__________________
Irish---Better to be dead & cool,then alive & uncool!
(Harley Davidson & the Marlboro Man)