Hiya All,
I have been with my partner for about 7months now but I am not really sure if he is as commited as I am. He is alway's looking at porn on the net, talking to his ex's and telling themabout our sex life and with one he was planning to meet up with her behind my back and telling her that he still has feelings for her.
I have confronted him about this and he say's in relation to meeting up with her he was only leading her on and telling her that he had fellings for her to see what he can get out of her as she has feelings forhim and claims that she loves him..
So I am really confused and not really sure what to beleive, I do want to trust him but he is really testing my trust and patience....

Can somebody please help me????

Sorry hun but he sounds like an ass....

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Trust is truly the basis of any good relationship. It sounds like he hasn't a clue what that means, so sorry Hon. Sounds like he has all he'd ever need and doesn't respect that enough to act responsibly.... whatta turd!

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As to marriage or celibacy, let a man take which course he will. He will be sure to repent - Socrates

Love is not looking in each other's eyes, but looking together in the same direction - Antoine De Saint-Exupery

I wouldn't feel comfortable with my boyfriend talking to his ex-girlfriends about our sex life, let alone leading another woman on! It's incredibly cruel to the other woman, too. He wants to see what he can get out of her? I hope he gets a punch in the face or a kick in the balls.

Don't waste your time on him hun. Do not invest anymore of yourself in this relationship. I know it is easier said than done sometimes, but you need to take this step. Game playing with someone's emotions is a form of abuse and you need to break away from him.

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A blessed thing it is for any man or woman to have a friend, one human soul whom we can trust utterly, who knows the best and worst of us, and who loves us in spite of all our faults.

Hi again, looloo

I realize my post may have seemed harsh & I'm glad Chey came in after with me with better, gentler reasoning.

I know you've been seeing him seven months & there's definitely some good to him but I saw lots of negatives about him in your post.

I concur with most of the responses listed: leave him.

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My blog - updated 11/24/2005

LixyChick, u wanted to know a few things yes he alwa's takes me out and pay's, at the same time I like to be independant and pay for myself, we do live together we have been for about 1 week now, he is a fulltime parent so he doesn't have time to go to work. We do split the bill half half he even pay's more in regards to the rent as my income is less, and he knows that i am really struggling at the moment.

Well there is a update he is no longer talking to this ex gf of his the one that he was going to meet up with, he told her that she is causing too many problems between us.

In relation to what someone else said aswell, I am not upset or mad that he is talking to his ex's, but it's the fact of what he talks to them about and what he say's to them that pisses me off and makes me think that he is not 100% commited to this relationship.

I think you are doing a good job here of answering your question for yourself.

Well looloo, I think you know what the right answers are for you, but as far as advice goes then you need to talk to him and tell him how you feel, If you do not like the things he is saying to them then you need to tell him and express your concerns. If this does not work then you need to think about getting rid of him as you two are not right for each other, he may not respect you the way you should be respected.

Luv2BeLicked is entirely right looloo.....you've confronted him, his explanations have been found wanting, so don't stick around for further heart ache.

I know it's hard to face being alone, but if you stay in a toxic relationship you're
a) sending out the message that his poor treatment of you is ok
b) not allowing yourself a chance at a more fulfilling life
c) eroding your own self esteem and dignity by staying with a man who you know to be lying to you

You are an honest, articulate, intelligent, kind woman. You deserve at least as much in from your partner in return.

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"Time flies like an arrow -
Fruit flies like a banana"

M Y - N A U G H T Y - P I C T U R E S ! !

So he buys you dinner?

You realize he's talking about your sex life to an ex?

I'm sorry, I've been in retarded relationships but if dude ever talked about our sex life to an ex, that would be the end.

I can be white trash but there are limits.

WildIrish touched on something important I feel:

If he is the kind of man who leads his ex on to 'see what he can get out of it' he sounds like a really nasty piece of work to me.

For a start, what was he hoping to get out of it? Sex? Money? Eeeeek!

Listen to those alarm bells honey and run for the hills!

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"Time flies like an arrow -
Fruit flies like a banana"

M Y - N A U G H T Y - P I C T U R E S ! !

YEAH I KNOW I HAVE TRIED TALKING TO HIM ABOUT IT AND HE SAY'S IT WAS JUST FOR A JOKE!! :-( WHICH I DON'T BELEIVE IT JUST SEEMS LIKE HE IS FULL OF EXCUSES

All kinds of very nasty warning signs there. I would say drive on to something new. Doesn't sound like a good vibe at all.