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  #1  
Old 10-17-2005, 06:15 PM
Lilith's Avatar
Lilith Lilith is offline
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Stolen

but I thought some peeps would like it.

Installing Love


Tech Support: Yes, ... how can I help you?

Customer: Well, after much consideration, I've decided to install Love. Can you guide me though the process?

Tech Support: Yes. I can help you. Are you ready to proceed?

Customer: Well, I'm not very technical but I think I'm ready. What do I do first?

Tech Support: The first step is to open your Heart. Have you located your Heart?

Customer: Yes, but there are several other programs running now. Is it okay to install Love while they are running?

Tech Support: What programs are running ?

Customer: Let's see...I have the Past Hurt, Low Self-Esteem, Grudge and Resentment running right now.

Tech Support: No problem, Love will gradually erase Past Hurt from your current operating system. It may remain in your permanent memory but it will no longer disrupt other programs. Love will eventually override Low Self-Esteem with a module of its own called High Self-Esteem. However, you have to completely turn off Grudge and Resentment. Those programs prevent Love from being properly installed. Can you turn those off ?

Customer: I don't know how to turn them off. Can you tell me how?

Tech Support: With pleasure. Go to your start menu and invoke Forgiveness. Do this as many times as necessary until Grudge and Resentment have been completely erased.

Customer: Okay, done! Love has started installing itself. Is that normal?

Tech Support: Yes, but remember that you have only the base program. You need to begin connecting to other Hearts in order to get the upgrades.

Customer: Oops! I have an error message already. It says, "Error - Program not run on external components." What should I do?

Tech Support: Don't worry. It means that the Love program is set up to run on Internal Hearts, but has not yet been run on your Heart. In non-technical terms, it simply means you have to Love yourself before you can Love others.

Customer: So, what should I do?

Tech Support: Pull down Self-Acceptance; then click on the following files: Forgive-Self; Realize Your Worth; and Acknowledge your Limitations.

Customer: Okay, done.

Tech Support: Now, copy them to the "My Heart" directory. The system will overwrite any conflicting files and begin patching faulty programming. Also, you need to delete Verbose Self-Criticism from all directories and empty your Recycle Bin to make sure it is completely gone and never comes back.

Customer: Got it. Hey! My heart is filling up with new files. Smile is playing on my monitor and Peace and Contentment are copying themselves all over My Heart. Is this normal?

Tech Support: Sometimes. For others it takes a while but, eventually, everything gets it at the proper time. So Love is installed and running. One more thing before we hang up. Love is Freeware. Be sure to give it, and its various modules, to everyone you meet. They should, in turn, share it with others and return some cool modules back to you.

Customer: Thank you
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The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§

~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas
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  #2  
Old 10-17-2005, 06:32 PM
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Cheyanne Cheyanne is offline
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I liked that... thank you
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  #3  
Old 10-17-2005, 06:33 PM
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Aqua Aqua is offline
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Thank you Lil. That's cool.

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Put me on wheels and I'll turn tricks.

Clever? Nah, I ran out of that years ago. But if you find this, let me know, k?
"The road goes ever on..." ~ Tolkien

In memory of my friend skip...
Go then, there are other worlds than these
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  #4  
Old 10-17-2005, 06:43 PM
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Lilith Lilith is offline
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A little bit warm & fuzzy for me but I was having a sappy moment.
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The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§

~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas
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  #5  
Old 10-17-2005, 06:58 PM
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Oldfart Oldfart is offline
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Lil,

My copy keeps telling me to run "Carnality" module.
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  #6  
Old 10-17-2005, 07:40 PM
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awwwwwwwwww
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Trees give peace to the souls of men * Nora Waln

The forest would be very quiet if no other birds sang than those who sing the best * Henry van Dyke

some fairly sordid tales, rambles, and anecdotes
Hypothetically Speaking * Something More * Cammy Interrupted * An Experimental Vacation * Masked * so..damn..hot * Thank You * My toy, his idea * no.19 Maple Lane * I Have A Surprise For You * Yesterday * In a Quiet Kitchen * help me decide * untitled prose * more untitled prose
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  #7  
Old 10-17-2005, 08:29 PM
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Winston77 Winston77 is offline
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I know just the person that needs to see this. Thanks
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Live Life, hearses don't come with luggage racks.
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  #8  
Old 10-17-2005, 08:37 PM
jseal jseal is offline
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Lilith,

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Eudaimonia
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  #9  
Old 10-17-2005, 08:40 PM
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Lilith Lilith is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Winston77
I know just the person that needs to see this. Thanks


Must be why I posted it, cause it's atypical.
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The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§

~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas
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  #10  
Old 10-17-2005, 08:42 PM
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nicole2309 nicole2309 is offline
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i saw that one somewhere else... but it's nice to see it again, thanks
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Confidence is the sexiest thing a woman can have. It's much sexier than any body part. Aimee Mullins

It's just human. We all have the jungle inside of us. We all have wants and needs and desires, strange as they may seem. If you stop to think about it, we're all pretty creative, cooking up all these fantasies. it's like a kind of poetry. Diane Frolov



How to get an "A"
I Love Guys With Accents
Nurse ~ Patient Story
Yes Sir
An Old Story of Mine
3 Guys & 1 Girl ~ Sounds like fun right
A New Short Story
Punishment Story
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  #11  
Old 10-18-2005, 05:57 AM
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WildIrish WildIrish is offline
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That was really nice. Thank you, Lil, for being atypical.
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Though I am different from you,
We were born involved in one another.


For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.

Complete surrender should not just come at moments in which one faces overwhelming odds, but in the calm when it seems one is personally in complete control of one's life.
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  #12  
Old 10-18-2005, 01:14 PM
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mayhem1978 mayhem1978 is offline
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that was soo sweet i love it. Thank you Lil
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