1. Ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backwards: NAIVE

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2. Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool?

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3. OK.... so if the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the "Jags" and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are known as the "Bucs," what does that make the Tennessee Titans?


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4. If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea...does that mean that one enjoys it?

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5. There are three religious truths:
a. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.
b. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian faith.
c. Baptists do not recognize each other in the liquor store or at Hooters.

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6. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

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7. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

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8. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?

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9. Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?

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10. Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a racecar is not called a racist?

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11. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?

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12. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted,cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?

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13. If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?

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14. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

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15. What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?

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16. I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me ....they're cramming for their final exam.

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17. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks , so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use? toothpicks?

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18. Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen can look for them while they deliver the mail?

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19. If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?

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20. You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

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21. Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?

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22. If a cow laughed, would milk come out of her nose?

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23. Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?

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Irish---Better to be dead & cool,then alive & uncool!
(Harley Davidson & the Marlboro Man)

on #15 I don't know ask PF, as for the rest I can't stop laughing

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"I've seen a look in dogs' eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts." - John Steinbeck

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lmao

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Trees give peace to the souls of men * Nora Waln

The forest would be very quiet if no other birds sang than those who sing the best * Henry van Dyke

some fairly sordid tales, rambles, and anecdotes
Hypothetically Speaking * Something More * Cammy Interrupted * An Experimental Vacation * Masked * so..damn..hot * Thank You * My toy, his idea * no.19 Maple Lane * I Have A Surprise For You * Yesterday * In a Quiet Kitchen * help me decide * untitled prose * more untitled prose

dreamgurl---I thought the same thing when I submitted it! Irish

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Irish---Better to be dead & cool,then alive & uncool!
(Harley Davidson & the Marlboro Man)

LMAO way to cute

nikki

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Ravage Me!

Me Time
Long Lonley Night
Tied Up
Teased

http://thesmashedfairy.blogspot.com/

LMAO

Very good. Especially #18.


The answer to #15 is "pink".

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Pink Hair?I,ve never been able to figure,what causes the whole
hair thing.My father,was balding as a teen.One of his brothers was 1/2 bald.His oldest brother had a very thick head of hair,
when he was 55.All from the same mother & father. Irish
P.S.Their sister is still alive & still has hair!!!!

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Irish---Better to be dead & cool,then alive & uncool!
(Harley Davidson & the Marlboro Man)

I know a lot of people have put their heads to it. Nothing but solutions so far.

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Hair trickles down from the mother's side, so blame her. My husband was scared shitless when he started to have a recedding hair line in highschool, because his dad was starting to bald at 26. Nick stopped receding, though, and has a full head of curly hair, like his Maternal uncle.

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My Corset Pictures My Feathers My Legs My 'get to know me' pics
Love's Bitch, the writings of my mind

lmao excellent! I love these things

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FussyPucker

There are only 10 types of people in the world: Those who understand binary, and those who don't...

Sarcasm: It's not big and it's not clever...........but it's funny as fuck!

The Special One!

too funny, thanks Irish!