i have a question?

i was talking to my lover earlier, and told him i loved him and he said you don't have to keep saying that. i suppose i say it too much according to him. why would he say that? it really hurt.

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All the beauty of nature can be found in a single butterfly.

Hiya Pepsigirl,

You will probably get a million different answers to that question. But here are my thoughts.

When my girlfriend lived with me she used to say she loved me far too much (if that is possible) it would be the end of every conversation on the phone, when we went to sleep and when we left for work.

I loved her with every ounce of my body, but felt that if I said it too much that it would just become another 3 words.

That way, when I toild her that I loved her, I liked to think that it meant more, because I didn't just blab it out for the sakes of it.

As I said, no doubt a lot of people will disagree with me here, but I think that if it is said too much then it just becomes three meaningless words.

Hope that helps.

In the past I've had guys whom I've felt have said it too much........but what it really was that got to me, was that they were too insecure to cope with saying it if I didn't say it back. I hated saying it just because they had as I felt it lacked sincerity.

When I say it now.....I say when I happen to be feeling it (which is a hell of a lot of the time) but neither of us feel we have to say it just because the other one does.

Perhaps you should make it clear that he doesn't have to chime in with 'I love you too' everytime you happen to get the urge to say it.

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"Time flies like an arrow -
Fruit flies like a banana"

M Y - N A U G H T Y - P I C T U R E S ! !

My current girlfriend has told me she loves me on a number of occasions, but I think that I should wait to reciprocate at least until her divorce is final

Loulabelle, I think it's just part of our makeup as guys to feel compelled to respond. Maybe showing someone love, and making them feel loved, counts for more in the long run.

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seriousfun

thanks you all.

i appreciate your insight. i don't want to make him feel he has to say it everytime i do. i just have such powerful feelings toward him that they rush over me and i do say it a lot, but i feel like i could never say it enough. guess i need to tone it down, huh?

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All the beauty of nature can be found in a single butterfly.

My guy says it more than I would but I just accept it because he's more cuddly than me, too. We're all different . . . sometimes I will say, "you know, that's the 15th time today - can we just assume we still love each other without expressing it for another few hours?"

I say:

If ya feel it say it! There is nothing like spontaneous affection.

But then I'm loved up so I would say that.

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"Time flies like an arrow -
Fruit flies like a banana"

M Y - N A U G H T Y - P I C T U R E S ! !

I was told repeatedly by my ex that he "loved" me
Turned out to be a lot of "hot air"
He "loved" the control
He "loved" the power
He "loved" the fact that I thought the sun shone from his butt!
(he assaulted me~~~~but thats in the past now!)


It took me "ages" to voice my feelings for Dm~~~~~~~~~had to wait till I was brave enough~~~~~~~~but now I tell him all the time~~~~~~~~~~and if it worries or upsets anyone~~Tough!!!!!!!
Life is too short and uncertain to hide u'r feelings away~~~~~~~a lesson learned many years ago

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Don't pet the sweaty things!!!!

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Celticangel~~~~ you are my , you are my ; you are EVERYTHING to me....... I LOVE YOU ! !

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The selfish, they're all standing in line
Faithing and hoping to buy themselves time
Me, I figure as each breath goes by
I only own my mind

The voices talk to all but in many languauges, shapes, sounds and whispers, sometimes at night, sometimes in the private world of tears and dreams, sometimes from rooftops, louder than bombs, higher than mountains and, (Though I'm not a fan Lennon was right) - All you need is love and there is no heart that can't be broken, there's no one too tough to cry.

Philosophic (spelt badly) Wildeye (emotional and strangely reasonable.)

That was beautiful Wildeye! Wow your wife is a lucky lady!


Say what you mean and mean what you say! If it is sincere they should know it, and understand.

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my pics

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Never say never, but if you do it's okay to change your mind~me, I think

The word "Love" is only a mere word. I would rather have someone show me that they "truly" loved me with their actions, sesitivity, thoughtfulness, devotion, mutual respect, and caring then have someone simply say it just to say the words and not really mean it. Who knows why some people can't show it or say it, my guess is that they don't really know how or are afraid of rejection. There could be a million different reasons why a person doesn't "say it". If you can give love as well as receive it then you are blessed. To feel loved is a much nicer feeling then simply saying it.

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Missy

I think with a lot of guy's to say I Love You means a
Commitment,so they may not want to hear it said to them.

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you can alway's tell a limey,But Not Much


I'm so miserable with out you,

It's almost like having you here

One GF seemed to want to hear it all the time from me, and that took some of the meaning/magic away, in my opinion.
I agree with Missy that it should just as much be in the things NOT said, or the things done instead of said.
Although I will grant you that perhaps over the telephone or via just email, where you don't have visual cues, maybe the little reminders become a little more important.
I try to keep it through things said and only say it when I truly feel it...and no I don't think it's necessarily a commitment thing, as even my closest friends know that I love them, in a different way.