I did have to walk into a Wal-Mart with the front of my shirt soaked in "man chowder" once...Girlfriend gave me great "road head" but couldn't keep it all in her mouth. Her face was a little sticky too.

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I wish all the ladies were pies on the shelf...and I was the baker because I'd eat them all myself.
I wish all the ladies were potholes in the road...and I was a dumptruck because I'd fill them with my load.