Well, I haven't had much experience breaking up with anyone, but heres one that a gal used on me.

Had a great thing going and a very active sex life. Then all of a sudden she turned cold and wouldnt answer my calls. Finally I got through to her and she told me she didnt wanna see me no more cause I made her cum too hard/often.

Go figure.

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Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to slide in broadside , thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming --WOW-- What a Ride!