Well, good, I'm glad to know I'm not the only one thinking it doesn't sound good for the relationship that he's inviting an ex, and that he didn't care that said ex injured his partner.

I would tell him, myself. I would be absolutely clear on what you expect (NO PAIN! NO unexpected and undiscussed kinky stuff!!), and tell him that you are concerned about his sudden need to include and ex REPEATEDLY in your sex life. Once is odd enough, but to obsess about doing it again.

I thought maybe I was being hyperparanoid.