Actually the trainwreck will be if I ever actually see any abuse. Surely though he's smart enough to know that. Thanks for your thoughts Lil, I knew you'd be along with something to add. Thanks to you too Steph. Answers are as few as hen's teeth but it's good to have friend's support.

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As to marriage or celibacy, let a man take which course he will. He will be sure to repent - Socrates

Love is not looking in each other's eyes, but looking together in the same direction - Antoine De Saint-Exupery