I don't have any real experience in this area, I know that we have a couple of members who come to Pixies here and there who have started here in one "form" and then opened up to share more of themselves with us as time went by. I think whenever that happens it is a great compliment to all, that a person feels able to safely reveal more of themself - it's a great compliment to the person who reveals more of himself as well .... it's not an easy thing to do!!!

Now as to the question about if you are gay .... I'm sure you are the only one who can discover the answer to that, however, I've come to realize that there are more choices that people make that fall in between being strait or gay as well, as a sinewhat related i.e., "cross-dressing" there are those who live that choice full time, part time, occassionally and any of those could be strait, gay or bi-sexual. There are men who don't do cross-dressing full out, but like to wear women's underwear .. sometimes, just as Randygal says, it's a tactile/texture kind of thing and feels sexy to them.

No matter what answer you come to discover about yourself, your life to this point has not been wasted, life is a journey, a time of discovery and in my experience, we discover things about ourselves when it is the right time to do so and when we are able to deal with the issues that come with each new discovery.

The thing that I have come to believe is most important in this life is that we do what we can to help others and love them and ourself along the way .... everything I've learned about you is that you are a loving giving man, still working on the part about loving yourself, but you certainly do much in support of others. That is not wasted time or life! Sending hugs your way!!!