How awful, Gilly. I can't believe I didn't see this thread yesterday. You and your family are all in our thoughts.

It sounds like she is in the right place. It must have been a terrible burden to keep her vicodin relapse a secret from all of the people who loved her, and she must have been filled with shame and fear. In-patient evaluation, drug treatment (and I can't stress this enough) twelve step work and counseling FOR THE ENTIRE FAMILY is the only way my family was able to support my recovery several years ago.

Addiction is a terrible disease. The addict's brain is careening wildly between numbness and induced euphoria one moment and shame the next. The parts of our brain that crave connection and spiritual growth begin to shut down, and the parts of us that live in fear and guilt grow and grow and grow. And we get more and more afraid of honesty, intimacy, and vulnerability. For years, I used to lie awake at night hoping that if I could fall asleep maybe I would die before I woke and be released from the torture of my life.

It sounds like your cousin has, for whatever reason, run out of places to hide. This could be an incredible blessing for her and her entire family: People in recovery often learn to thank their Higher Power for the consequences of their actions, because this can often force them to confront themselves and see that the adaptive strategy of isolation was doomed to failure.

I wish her and your entire family peace, strength, and hope.