LOL. I agree wholeheartedly with wyndhy. A little fantasy goes a long way towards keeping people from straying, so I'm all for him looking at porn or fantasizing, but acting on it would definitely be another story. I think that intent is a good marker for the boundary between flirting/cheating, but also guilt-- If bells and whistles go off in your conscience, you should probably stop what you are doing before you end up hurting someone. As far as the double standard- I would hold myself to the same standards of conduct that I would hold him to.

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I am certain of nothing but the holiness of the heart's affections and the truth of imagination. What the imagination seizes as beauty must be truth - whether it existed before or not.
-John Keats