When I went through a divorce (of my own initiative) I felt like a failure. I don't accept failure very well....especially in life altering choices I make. Marriage is one of the biggest life altering choices I've ever made!

After the final papers arrived, I cried and had a pity party for myself. It was pathetic! I was the one who wanted this and now I was crying about it! Later, I realized that this was exactly what jennaflower explained as grieving (mourning a death), and I wasn't any different than anyone else in feeling a loss....even though I initiated it.

I thought of it in this manner........I "pulled the plug" on a dying relationship because it had no hope of ever having normalcy again! In that way, I could let go of the grief and go on with my life without feeling all the guilt I was bound to carry if I continued to pity myself about the broken relationship.

It's so true that there will be stages of mourning before, during, and after a divorce. When it all comes to an end, you'll be a stronger person for the life lesson this has taken you through!

Good luck hun! Keep an eye on that light at the end of the tunnel!

__________________
Minds are like parachutes. They only work when they are open.

~Thomas Dewar~