jennaflower - I am happy with myself, as happy as I've ever been. Thank you for your embrace, I see pixies as more than a website, it's a community.

Oldfart - You put a whole new meaning to hitting the nail on the head. The amount of time spent by myself over the years has given me the opportunity to really examine myself.

babybunny - This is a militant analogy so bear with me "standing in the middle of a minefield with no cover what so ever, a sniper has you in his sights and will begin shooting in 5 seconds." This is the best way I've found to describe the panic that I go through when around a lot of people I don't know. Therefore, I undoubtably know the hell one goes through when filled with panic. I take a daily antidepressant but for my other symptoms I rely mainly on marijuana. The onset and severity of the panic I go through, I can't afford to wait 30-45 min. for a pill to kick in. As I've said before, I can't take a lot of pills so anything more than my daily antidepressent is for emergencies and they basically put me into a drug induced coma. Marijuana is for me a miracle drug and it helps my panic instantly, it may for you as well.