Subject: raise request...

"REQUEST FOR A RAISE"

I, the penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following
reasons:

-I do physical labour
-I work at great depths
-I plunge head first into everything I do
-I do not get weekends off or public holidays
-I work in a damp environment
-I don't get paid overtime
-I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation
-I work in high temperatures
-My work exposes me to contagious diseases

Signed,
Penis

************************************************** **
Dear Penis,

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, The administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

-You do not work 8 hours straight
-You fall asleep on the job after brief work periods
-You do not always follow the orders of the management team
-You do not stay in your allocated position, and often visit other areas
-You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working
-You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift
-You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing
-You'll retire well before reaching 65
-You're unable to work double shifts
-You sometimes leave your allocated position before you have completed the day's work
-Your frequently sick on the job
-And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and leaving the workplace carrying 2 suspicious looking bags.


Sincerely,
TheManagement

__________________
_______________________
*Diva*



"Never shall I forget the time I spent with you. Please
continue to be my friend, as you will always find me yours."
Ludwig van Beethoven (1770-1827)

"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."