Hi sweetie.
HUGS I am so sorry to hear about the terrible thing that happened to you, and I am so pleased to see you write that you have come to terms with it. I used to work in a large city ER department, (New Orleans), and I have seen the devastation that this can bring.

OK, about the problem you have posted. You have only given us a little peek into your sexual life, so it is hard to answer all you have asked.
I think that both of you are very young, (did I really say that?) and not very experienced. TALK TO HIM! He needs training in how to be a good lover, how to be a good lover TO YOU. You MUST share with him, or any lover. (Guys, a lot of you here have asked me about the differences between sex with a man and another woman. One thing I have found is that another woman is going to listen to me during sex... this is just a general thing, please don't yell at me)
I LOVE to give bj's, and also love to swallow. I ALSO love the feel of a man's cum on my skin...
Most men love it when a woman swallows. BUT if he gets put out over my not swallowing for some reason, (and sometimes they do), or get rude over my request that they use a condom if they want to cum in my mouth, (maybe because I don't know him well enough), that tells me he is not he is not someone I want to date. I swallow only if I want to... and sometimes this is all that happens between us, because for me sex doesn't always mean we both cum.
In other words, sometimes I go down on a man, he cums, I swallow, or rub it over my skin, or help him take the condom off, and then we go on doing whatever. It is fun, sexy, and requires less privacy than full sex... But this is what I ENJOY, not what YOU have to do.
I like the fact that you two were trying something new, and that he ASKED first, it shows that there is a lot hope for him, he seems to care.
After he came, and you returned to the bedroom, he lasted only 3 minutes before saying he was "too tired". If you yell at him he will get defensive, and then angry, and nothing will be acomplished except a fight. Maybe next time, you should cum first, and then treat him to a bj. Maybe he will enjoy cumming on your breasts or something similar, IF you enjoy it.
Also, don't start lying about having an orgasm. His ego will survive. It is a bad habit to get into.

I hope this helps, or at least, doesn't hurt.


Wickedly, (and feeling old at 30)

WW