This my sound a little cynical.....

I have been in relationships where I allowed the other person to control my feelings......... example, perhaps my degree of love encompassing my belief in self. Trying to please that other person in the name of expressing my love, but loosing myself in the process.

Each person's definition of love is different from mine... oh, there may be similarities, but each is individual. I may love someone "in my own way", and they in turn "love me in their own way."... I accept that and am grateful. Who am I to try to shape their definition/feelings/attitudes/expressions, to coincide exactly with mine?

Another example.... Husband & Wife ~ the woman is more affectionate, likes to cuddle, says "I love you." to her husband. The husband isn't very affectionate, not into cuddling, and doesn't verbally say "I love you."......

The wife is dissapointed and becomes suspicious because her husband doesn't express love like she does..... The husband gets upset because the wife is maybe holding out on him in the bedroom.... he loves her- he provides a roof over her head, takes care of her, fixes stuff, tells her supper was good.... that is how he expresses/feels his love for her.

A lot of people base their definitions of Love only on themselves.. not others, and sometimes get "hurt" in the process. This isn't to say that I am a machine, or that I don't hurt, but I have learned to not allow/disallow others expressions of Love to alter what I feel......

Hope that I didn't confuse anyone...

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A blessed thing it is for any man or woman to have a friend, one human soul whom we can trust utterly, who knows the best and worst of us, and who loves us in spite of all our faults.