I tortured my mother because I always stayed out too late and drank and smoked pot and told her I was going on the pill.

I was the oldest child and of course they were the most strict with me . . . now that I've been away from home for more than a decade she admits I was always a free spirit and she always knew I'd be fine but she added a lot of grey hairs by worrying so much.

I helped her sanity by moving out when I was 17. Would have moved out earlier if I could have . . .

I remember my father saying, "You'll never have it as good as you have it here!"

I love him but respectfully disagree.

Badass to the bone, I guess.