Dubious
Bet you didn't think you'd be on the wrong side of the law when you started this quiz? Thought you were sweet and innocent? Well maybe you should swot up on the law. Otherwise you never know when you might get a knock on the door…

Based on your answers, we have calculated the maximum penalty for your crimes*:

Years in prison: 13 Potential fine: £5000


Yikes! I'll have to stop massaging hubbies crotch while we ride through Allentown! Geezzzz! Talk about outdated laws!

Fussy, please explain the mincemeat and Christmas thing!? What is mincemeat anyway?

Which head do they decapitate in Indonesia? LMFAO!

When I send my last payment (to finally pay off a longstanding bill) I always put the stamp on upside down to say (in my own little way) fuck you and naner naner!

May I borrow 5000 quid?

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Minds are like parachutes. They only work when they are open.

~Thomas Dewar~