at Princeton a lady named lane
had a terribly intricate brain
she could do magic tricks
with balls and with sticks
that drove the whole golf team insane


this one is mavis from yale
she's now doing post-grad in jail
you see as a frosh
her house was quite posh
with a sign reading "this one's for sale"


the lady is helen of brown
her aim is a black cap and gown
to pay for pre-dental
and bills monumental
she made lots of dough going down


this is lolita from penn
who often made deals with men
you see for a buck
she'd strip down and fuck
and between classes she'd do it again


at dartmouth the winters are cold
but letitia van gyde still made gold
she got a room and a booker
she's an after-school hooker
and a good student also we're told

prunella came from bryn mawr
to her that old school was a bore
her major's pre-med
she minors in bed
'cause at harvard they all pay to score


virginia she's realy a lion
the trustees all think she's quite fine
she works morningside hights
and other fine sites
on a scale up to ten she'a a nine

__________________
it's only kinky the first time

it's not the orgasm but getting there thats fun

a shot in the bush is worth two in the hand

whip me, beat me, tie me up, break my arm, but please don't break my heart

"The trouble with the world is that the stupid people are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt" -Bertrand Russell