Freaky Martha would probably find some obscene way to turn a lump of coal in your stocking into some crazy craft or gift you could re-gift to another. I'll be one of those ones who'll gladly wait her turn in line to slap her!

Thanks for the laughs Lilith, I needed them

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Though dreams can be deceiving, like faces are to hearts; they serve for sweet relieving when fantasy and reality lie too far apart.-Fiona Apple