shit, man, with as many insipid jokes and idiotic questions i get about piercing, count yerself lucky. i just saw a fuckin commercial for some insurance company where parents scolded their fucktard daughter for not shoppin around for the best price on a tongue piercing. fuck trends, man. they demean any and everything that means anything to anyone.

and if by some Buddha-blessed miracle the fuckwits don't ask me a question that makes my balls seize, they think i tattoo instead. muthafuckers... it's a completely different avenue, but people look at me like i'm a fuckin window-lickin helmet-wearer when they ask me if i "do tattoos" and i again hafta remind em that i pierce, and the two aren't linked in the slightest beyond virtue of the fact that they've both gained an astonishingly irritating tendency to become popular over the past few years. like a dog lookin in a mirror, man, i swear. gah... i'm through.