Originally Posted by osuche

(((((Steph)))))

I think it's a matter of finding someone with flaws that are acceptable to you. Everyone has issues, but you may be more forgiving of some issues than others. Find someone who has flaws that you're willing to live with, and one or two other characteristics you really admire.

I think the admiration is important -- I find it impossible to be with someone I can't admire.

As for your big red X -- the only advice I can give is to love yourself, flaws and all. Makes it so much easier for someone else to love you. I have *many* issues -- some of them you know and yet I've come to like myself...warts and all.

Last piece of advice....get outta dodge for a while and find some new haunts. When I moved ot SF -- happily married -- I found 2 men within about the past 9 months who I could have happily shared my life with. I'm still happily married, but I do think that a change of venue helped me find some new people I really care about.