A few years ago, I would've thought I had it all figured out.

My response would've been along the lines of:

She fell in love with you and you two married...there must've been something there that she saw and liked, right? Are you too soft? Are you not? I don't know, but she probably does. Ask her. Communication is essential in a relationship.


Now, however, though I still believe communication is essential...I've had it pointed out to me that female minds are much more subtle than men's so-called minds. It's not always comfortable for two people to have those conversations, even though they're very much in love. So we talk with our actions.

Listen to the little things she's "saying". She's unintentionally dropping clues, and you can read them. They'll give you great insight into what she likes now and what she may want to see change. Stop listening to your thoughts and start listening to hers.

__________________
Though I am different from you,
We were born involved in one another.

For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.

Complete surrender should not just come at moments in which one faces overwhelming odds, but in the calm when it seems one is personally in complete control of one's life.