I personally don't do it because I think it does change the nature of sex. My husband (who I've been with 18 years and married for 13 years, and no anniversay until August) does use it. If I ask him to do something he always wants to know what's in it for him.

For instance, if I mention I need my oil changed he mentions he needs a blow job, as if it's a payment. I think it hinders the spontenaity of sex within the relationship, and lowers it to a chore vs. pleasure where I feel it should be maintained.

Mind you his idea of foreplay is, "Can I do ya?"

And no I don't recall how it got this way, or even if it always was this way. But it doesn't sit well with me. I have deeper needs than a "can I do ya?" or "You owe me sex for watching the kids." Excuse me, I thought that was called parenting.

Ending ranting vent now.

I was just curious if others share this observation of bartering sex or if it's as common as I think.

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