Exhaustion and Lack of Focus
 

Just a question....

I've been going through this period recently where I am always exhausted - mentally and emotionally. Sometimes people talk to me and I can't even tune in enough to process what they're saying. I mean - I literally walk off midway through the conversation and I don't even know why I do it.

I've been sleeping about 6-8 hours a night (which is my usual) but I wake up exhausted too.

I've never been this mentally sluggish and easily frustrated. I get these periods of irrational anger, too.
Anger + exhaustion + inattention = disaster.

The only two things that have changed since I've been having these problems - about 2.5 weeks - are the following:
- We're going through a strategy process at work which has taken a lot of time and emotional energy
- I've not been working out
- It's the end of the semester and I'm busy with class deadlines

I also recently got bitten by a spider...but other than that there have been no major illnesses or any other changes.

Any ideas about how I can cure my malaise? I'm starting to get worried - I can't focus, am always tired, and I scare myself when I get angry like I've been doing. Any and all suggestions are welcome.

((((Pixies))))

Have you ever thought about medatation, when I start getting the way you've described a even just a few minutes does me wonders.
Someone gave me a great book "The Three Minute Medatator" 30 simple ways to unwind your mind while enhaning your emotional intelligence, by David Harp and beleive it or not the forward was written by Ben and Jerry

Well, I'll take a quick stab at it.

The way I see it, you have simply been pushing yourself too hard for too long. The extra course at school this semester may have been just what it took to push you over the top.

You are getting the sleep that you would normally get but you aren't getting the rest and relaxation.

Let's see how close I am with this one. You go from work to school, grab something to eat quickly between the two. After class you go home and do more work before you go to bed. Or if it's not work then you do some schoolwork, or sometimes both.

When you do hit the pillow you are thinking about what you have done during the day and what you will be doing tomorrow. I'm betting that you are thinking about those things while you are asleep as well, as stupid as that may sound.

Your weekends are filled with more classwork and also work that you've brought home from the job, right?

I think you need some good, quality "osuche time" where you relax and enjoy life without thinking or worrying about school and work. And I think you need it on a more regular basis, not just every once in awhile. You've been on one hell of a pace for quite some time now osuche. Probably too simple of a solution but I really think that your body just isn't getting the chance to recover from your stressful job and classes and it's just sort of deciding to do it whenever it wants to.

Just my thoughts on it.

(((((((Osuche)))))))

Time for me to try again to get the sleep that I'm needing. :wave:

Yep, I know it sounds obvious but you are suffering from stress.

All of your complaints are classic indicators.

You need to realise that an ineffectual Osuche is no help to anyone and that in this case, putting yourself higher up your priority list is not being selfish, it will actually benefit everyone.

You've said in the past that working out helps you to relax and while that's a concept completely lost on me, perhaps finding a half hour a day to do some exercise will get you back on track. Alternatively, some other kind of relaxation technique for just ten minutes a day can make a difference.

I know you think you don't have time, but at the moment you're probably spending more than 10 minutes a day trying to sort out things you've messed up, apologising to people you've upset with your anger, or beating yourself up about how you aren't being the best Osuche you can be.

For everyone's benefit, you have to put yourself closer to the top of your list for a while, and if anyone questions it (which they won't - it's sometimes depressing to see how the world does NOT stop spinning when you stop pedalling for a while) you need to explain that you need to do this in order to function.

The more useful a person you are in a family/ business/ whatever, the more important it is that you look after yourself. Take this from someone who has recently learned what it means for someone else's very existence to depend on you.

Thanks, everyone. I appreciate the perspective - I have very little of it myself right now.

Winston - I work with someone who is a medatative coach. Perhaps I need to get him to give me some tips.

IowaMan - I know you're right, but I've just been worried it's something more complex because stress has never felt this way to me before.

Lou - Your baby is lucky to have someone as sweet and perceptive as you to depend on. (((Lou)))

Osuche- perpective is exactly what you need. I can say this because I am in the midst of trying to gain some myself.

Step back and try to view where you are at more objectively. Look at where you can honestly give less so you can retain some time for yourself. I always say there is nothing I can shirk off on but truth be told I give 150% when giving 100% is really enough. Learn to stop at enough and not continue to put so much pressure on yourself. If you are anything like me people respect you for the way you do everything to the best of your ability. They won't think less of you for just completing the task.

All I can say, is from my experience everyone here is spot on. I don't have any great recommendations on how to fix it as I'm not sure I've found the perfect solutions yet.

What IM said about the quality of sleep is so important. But finding a way to turn the mind off when your head hits the pillow isn't always easy. What I've tried and it sometimes works is make a small list before you get in bed ... what you accomplished for the day (whether it was intended to be accomplished or not!) and what you have to work on the next day. Sometimes the pen to paper method is enough to get a few things off the mind for a period of time.

I hope you find some relief and quick.

((osuche))

I left an incredibly stressful job because I was collapsing inward. I think I aged ten additional years in the last two at that job, and things were physically breaking down. I was getting migraines & yes...my wang was not easily hugified by Mrs. WI's strenuous & persistent efforts.

I'm the kind of person who's mind never stops, so meditating is very difficult for me if it doesn't include some kind of activity to distract me. If I don't pass out the minute I close my eyes...I lay awake for hours with my mind spinning. Good thoughts as well as bad. I've tried reciting a verse over & over again. I've tried standard relaxation techniques to pinpoint where I store my tension, and recently I've been attempting to get a working knowledge of Tai Chi so I can go to a class & not look like a retarded ballerina on rollerskates. :p

I've considered going back to martial arts, but it's been a couple of years since I've done it...and I know I'll be very hard on myself when I see how soft I've let myself get. And quite frankly...I don't need that frustration right now.

I suggest getting your shapely butt back to the gym so you can blow off some steam & get some endorphins pumping. And taking everyone's advice & applying it in a way only you know how to your life.

And of course...don't be shy in reaching out to your friends.

Try and stop work - anything that involves physical or mental effort - at least an hour before your normal bedtime. Don't cheat by pushing your bedtime back an hour to compensate. In that time, unwind. Have a shower or bath, then snuggle with Mr. Osuche, watch some mindless TV, a favourite DVD, then go to bed. I find that I sleep much more soundly after having a shower in the evening. And try and get 8 hours consistently, maybe you can't function on 6 the way you used to..it happens.

Of course, how you can use this, I don't know, just thought I'd throw it out there for ya.

*huggles*

While it certainly sounds like you've got enough stress going on to be the cause of your problems, it might be a good idea to rule out any physical causes, disorders like sleep apnea could be behind this...
About 12 years ago, I was constantly sleepy & irratible, & having serious probs drifting off at the wheel...a sleep study determined that apnea was interupting my sleep several times a night, & a CPAP unit prescribed (that Mrs Zoid describes as "Darth")...while apnea is more likely in men (due to a larger soft pallette), women are by no means immune to it.

There's already loads of great advice from all the Pixie's above... so i'm just going to recommend a weekend getaway.

Seattle is beautiful this time of year.

;)

((((osuche))))
yup, lots of good advice, but....i've gathered from the few years i've gotten to now you through pixies that you sort of thrive on stress, so i must say i'd be a bit surprised if it wasn't more that just stress. not to rule that out, 'cause it sounds like things have gotten a bit out of control, and NOT to downplay the added recent stresses AT ALL but take scotz's advice and see a doc. maybe even a new mattress is in order. perhaps you are closing your eyes for the same amount of time you're used to but if you're tossin and turnin, you're not getting rest. (((more hugs))) i hope it all gets better real quick.

Thanks, everybody! I do think I'm going to schedule a check up...usually the doctors aren't terribly helpful with such nonspecific symptoms....but I checked my temp this morning and it was 99.5F and I'm usually a 97.3F girl. But I don't feel sick! Just exhausted, unfocused, and short of temper.

Lilith - Maybe you and I should form a perspective group...I often need a kickm in the ass to see what's apparent to others.

Maddy and WI - yes, good quality sleep is the most important. I like the idea of T'ai Chi, but I also crave the endorphin rush of working out. Maybe a workout plus list making is the best approach...

(((((Belial)))))

Scotz and whydhy...I'll take the good advice and go see what the dr recommends

Aqua: Will you take me out for fish tacos? ;)

Thanks everyone!!! I appreciate the advice.

I think part of it, and I know as I went through it...is that even though you're sleeping, it's not restful sleep - you're concerned about everything else going on in your life and it's not conducive to rest.

You should follow the others advice and try to completely relax before bed and if you find yourself thinking about all the things going on, try to find your happy place - somewhere in your mind where you can find peace....maybe that'll help...

just my 2 cents

I concur with the advice about seeing a doctor. It may be stress, lack of restful sleep, or even a mild form of depression. What you describe is exactly what I went thru a few years ago. I was diagnosed with mild depression and given pills... They helped for a while, but then I was right back where I started.. so I quit them. I went back to the doc, and she did more tests and found out that I was estrogen dominant. I was prescribed natrual progestron and felt 100% better! I was just a few years older than you when I went thru this... wouldn't hurt to have that checked while you are there too!

(((osuche)))