**~~TRANSLATIONS~~**
 

TRANSLATING WOMEN'S ENGLISH !!

Yes = No
No = Yes
Maybe = No
We need = I want
I'm sorry = You'll be sorry
We need to talk = I need to complain
Sure...go ahead = I don't want you to
Is my butt fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful
Do what you want = You'll pay for this later
I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron!
Are you listening to me?? = Too late, you're dead
You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me
Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs
You're so.. manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot
Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive
It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now
You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about??
I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV
How much do you love me? = I did something today that you're really not going to like




TRANSLATING MEN'S ENGLISH

I'm hungry = I'm hungry
I'm sleepy = I'm sleepy
I'm tired = I'm tired
Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
I love you = Let's have sex now
I'm bored = Do you want to have sex?
What's wrong = I guess sex tonight is out of the question
I love you, too = Okay, I said it...we'd better have sex now!
May I have this dance? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
Can I call you sometime? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
Will you marry me? = I want to make it illegal for you to have sex with other guys
You look tense, let me give you a massage = I want to have sex with you in the next ten minutes
Let's talk = I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a deep person and maybe then you'd like to have sex with me
I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I am gay

LMAO @ Sugarsprinkles!

lol ... I can't argue with any of that.

LOL, Sugar! Those are cute! Thanks.

LMAO. Now I'll be able to better communicate with my wife!:D

Thanks SS.

ROFLMFAO!!!! Good one Sugar!!!

Thanks SS.:)
I speak the one language, but really needed the first half of that Rosetta stone. :rolleyes:

LOL! Now I got it!

LMAO....is that what she meant the other day

LOL! Oh so true.... :D

****takes notes******

LOL

Yes, some of that could be true. :D

perhaps I am starting to understand women now.................. right its time for sex :D

Nice post SS - ...

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

I've been searching for a translator since I turned 13!

ROFL!