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Slippery-Dip Product Launch Party
You are cordially invited to attend the private product launch celebration for the OldFart SLIPPERY-DIPTM, also known as the S.O.F.A. (Scotzoid & Old Fart Apparatus). We will unveil the first prototype and the proposed marketing package at the festivities. Hors d'oevres will be served, and an open bar (featuring champagne, Chateau la Face '69, and Buttescotch Schnapps, among other favourite drinks) will be provided. Guests will have the opportunity to mingle (fluids) and to schmooze (or smooch), prior to the actual unveiling (or disrobing) of the much-anticipated Slippery-Dip. Apparel: Black tie... only. Location: The home of Sweetstuff, Graphic Designer and Social Coordinator, OSHA, in the scenic north-country Time: Now... oh god, baby... now!!!! R.S.V.P. A.S.A.P. c/o: OldFart & Scotz' Happyface Agency, 69 Cunning Court, Orgasm on Time, Slipshire, UK |
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Ladies and Gentlement, may I present to you...
The proposed marketing package for the OldFart Slippery-Dip! *applause* |
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And now, Mesdames et Messieurs, the moment you've all been waiting for...
It is my very great honour to present to you... The prototype model for the greatest invention since sliced bread... The OldFart Slippery-Dip! *thundering applause* |
:D :D Now that is a piece of work!! :D :D
Nice to see a woman laying back on the slide too!! TRES BIEN!! |
Let the party begin!!!!!!!!!
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****standing and cheering****
You are too cute! That is fun! ~~~~~~~~~>Lilith
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Well it doesn't seem like we have all the appropiate party's present for an official testing... :(
But I'm certainly ready to take my place on the Slippery Dip™! ;) :p |
We'll have all the official speechifying when the President and the CEO/Director arrive... For now, the bar's open, so let's party!!!
We need to make sure everyone's well lubricated before any testing can occur --- anyone up to helping me with that onerous task? ;) --- sweetstuff |
Since I'm one of the first here I hope i get a good spot on the S-D.:p :o :D
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LadyPleaser --- You mean there are bad spots on it? :confused:
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Not really but if I get on the bottem step all the ladys will have to climb over me.;)
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LP
is that a problem or a benefit?~~~~>Lilith
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Gee Sweetstuff, wouldn't mind helping you with anything... ;)
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Lilith it's a benefit thats why I tring to save the spot for me.:p
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That's one of the beauties of perpetual motion, LadyPleaser... See, the best part of this design is the infinite staircase on which it's based. The more ladies slide down over you, the closer you are to the top. And the closer you are to the top, the sooner it will be your turn to slide... That's why it's called Perpetual Motion Playground Equipment! Enjoy!!! --- sweetstuff |
OK so were are the President and CEO/Director so we can unveil the S-D. As HEAD of research and development I like to start the research.
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Ummmm... Shouldn't that read: "As head of R&D I lick to start the research"??? :p |
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Thanks, Aquaman --- might as well just dive right in, don't you think? ;) |
Like I say...
l l l l l l l l l \/ |
ROTFLMAO@Aquaman!!!!!! :D
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SFC yes it should be Lick, sorry about the typo.:D
P.S. Great graphics you really out did yourself with the drawings. |
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You know.... ROTFLMAO is just a couple vowels short of being a new, hi-performance Italian sports car... :cool: |
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Hey, good idea, Aquaman! High-performance Italian sportscars make great sex toys too... Maybe the OSHA should look at them as a potential new product line! :D Remind me to put that idea forward at the next board meeting. |
Okay, so we've unveiled the design scheme... But I still need a little help getting this thing all set up before the President and the CEO/Director arrive! I've got the instruction sheet here, but I think it requires more than one person to operate... Remember, we can't actually try it out until they get here, but we can darned well get ready!!! :p
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Oh, man, I really need help... I forgot the instructions! :o
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Here... Climb up this ladder and I'll stand underneath to hold it steady... with the aerial view you should be able to figure out what goes where... (I know I will... ;) ) |
So kind of you to help me, Aquaman --- but be careful, don't get that black tie of yours dirty! (It's the only part I'm not willing to help clean off...) :p :D Apart from that, enjoy the view! ;)
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Ladies and Gentlemen.
It is with great pleasure that I call together the SOFA test team to initiate phase 2 of this marvellous endeavour. I am gratified to see all the eager and intent faces before me, and feel proud to have the support of so many perverts. I now hand you over to my principal collaborator in this wonderful venture. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you, Scotzoidman. |
... Thunderous applause, as the crowd goes wild in appreciation for the men who have brought them such a stupendous creation ... Women swoon and throw panties at the speakers' platform ... Then a hushed silence falls as we all wait for the words of the Birthday Boy-slash-President of OSHA, Mr. Scotzoidman ...
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Huh?...what...oh, they're waitin for me?... gee, I, uhhhhh...
Is this thing on... testing 1-2-3... sorry I'm so late, I was getting a blo- uh, that is, I was meeting with a ... potential investor... yeh, that's it... so what can I say, but... hell, let's crank this puppy up, & see if it yelps... Y'know, that's the trouble with building a Perpetual Motion device... can't seem to stop working on it... |
Lilith stands patiently .....
she has envisioned this moment for weeks, years, decades (time escapes me). Perpetual pleasure, what will these boys think up next........~~~~~~~~~~>Lilith
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Ooooooohh
I'm all excited now! :D
I love parties!! Especially for something as important and interesting as the Slippery Dip. Mmmm, can I have more of the Chateau la Face 69 while we are waiting .............:p :p |
The hostess goes dancing through the excited crowd, whispering in the ears of her guests as she passes with her tray of champagne...
Delighted you could make it, Scotz! Sorry to tear you away from your, er, 'meeting' --- but I promise this will be worth it!!! Here, follow me, perhaps you could explain the basis of this wonderful contraption to Lilith; the girl's been marvelling at it all night... * Lilith, dear, do you realize that you're about to go down in history as the first woman ever to experience this Perpetual Pleasure!!! We're all sooooooo envious... But I'm right behind you in line! Scotz here is going to give you a personal tour to get things started, I believe, isn't that right, sir? * Xanne, great to see you! The party's just getting going, now that the dignitaries have finished their speeches. While you're waiting your turn for the Slippery-Dip, I'm positive that OldFart would be delighted to share a bottle or two of that Chateau le Face '69 with you --- look, he's hovering over the case of it over at the bar, waiting for someone to come along and give him an excuse to have a glass or three... :rolleyes: :D Here, let me introduce you, if you haven't already met... * OldFart, dahhhling, this is a simply smashing invention. Come, pour a glass of your ClF '69 for Xanne here, she's looking absolutely scrumptious in her heels (and nothing else) and she's looking for a gentleman to introduce her to the delights of this vintage wine. I think you're just the chap to do it! |
Of course, since Miz Lil has taken the position of Straw Boss & rode herd on me to finish the device, she certainly gets 1st in line to test the mechanism... this way, my dear Lady...
BTW, before we begin, Xanne (and anyone else wearing them) must remove her heels before entering the ride, fetching as she is in them... they may damage critical parts of the machinery, wouldn't want that to happen & spoil the ride... (speaking of which, does anybody know why porn actors/actresses never take off their shoes? One of the great Mysteries of Life I wonder about...) |
Hey wait for me. As Head of Quality Control I need to make sure that this device is put together correctly.
Yep, yep it looks okay and sturdy. Should be able to send the ladies down at least 1,000 times before we need to make any replacements or trade outs. Okay everyone, positions please. Let's rock this joint. |
Psst
Hey Scotz... The porn actresses leave their shoes on so that their feet are not showing. Most people are not very proud of how their feet look, so they keep the shoes or socks on. Not too mention, if they should get raided it is one less thing to have to put on. Or at least that is what I was told once.
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Hooray! We have approval from quality control! Is there anyone else whose department needs to approve this slide before we start? If so, speak up... If not, then everyone take your spots and let's get ready to have fun!!!!
Safety checklist: Has everyone removed their shoes and any other potentially damaging implements? ... Check! Has everyone read and understood the liability waiver? ... Aw heck, who cares about this legal mumbo-jumbo, I'll check that off anyway! Is everyone sufficiently lubricated? And is the vat of Butterscotch Schnapps in position at the top of the Infinite Staircase and ready to be turned on in case we need extra lube? ... Check! *slurp* Check again! :p Is everyone excited? ... Yeah, baby, yeah! Check! In that case, OldFart and Scotz can come right over here and cut the big red ribbon, and then Lilith can become the first woman ever to experience Perpetual Pleasure!!!!!!!!!! |
Lilith kicks off her heels....
She begins to ascend the soon to be infamous device, first cimbing over Lady Pleaser, who deviously chose the bottom step, passing Prophet, then Nutworld, Aquaman is next, pantyfanatic waits next, Scotz and OldFart have chosen a centralized position in order to keep things running slick. As she ascends she notices that more and more of the lovely Pixie's Men (your name enters here ;) )are taking their place at the top of this seemngly never ending :) pleasure toy. There are so many wonderful men waiting for the adventure to begin. Lilith figures she will soon be very *personally* introduced to all of these men who have kept her stimulated and in suspense for so long. She wonders if such a glorious climax to her secret desires is really possible and considers backing out for fear that all other sexual encounters from here on will simply pale by comparison. But not being one to turn away from an adventure Lilith stands atop the device and makes the speech(like the 1st astronaut on the moon)," This is one small lick for women and one perpetual orgasm for womenkind, thank you!" and she dives headfirst into the ams of the first awaiting gentleman, and so history begins...................
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!,u uuuuuuuuuuuuummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm,oh God yes Oh God, yes yes yes yes yes, ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo yes!, a little to the left, oh yessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss, more more more, oh yes harder, mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm just like that, hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, slurp slurp slurp, ooooooooooooooooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!, ooooooooooooooooooooo, long chains of barely audible groans,yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes................ ~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~>Lilith |
As Lilith has (slurp) climbed abour the Slipper-Dip it is now time to let the fun begin.:p :p :p :p
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Five ring circus
Ladies and gentlemen
Let the games begin. |
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