Oh no, not .... the whip again, Lilith. :D


Unfastening his belt, ...

Unfastening his belt, ... he realized his pants were too big and they fell down.

Kneeling in front ...

Kneelin in front of ******* I quickly unzipped his pants, opened my mouth, and touched the tip of my tongue to his very hard cock.

The taste of....

The taste of ... her was intoxicating to my senses.

Waking up early ...

Waking up early, I realize that last night was only a dream.


The batteries go dead....

The batteries go dead .... forcing a reversion to the trusty old finger.



The birds and the bees ...

The birds and the bees ... means that spring is on it's way and with it ... MATING SEASON! :D :D

You take the high road ...

You take the high road ... because you can be sure as hell that I'll be taking the low road.

:D

When will you want ...

When will you want ... to renew your annual "Perving for Fun and Profit Association" membership card?

Oh, crap ...

Oh, crap.... I'm so slow in giving DB his welcome back hug, he probably thinks I didn't notice his absence and happy return to pixies. (((((DB))))) glad ur back!! :D

Now, from the very beginning.....

Now, from the very beginning.....lets review each of the Kama Sutra positions. :D :D

(Thanks, TB)

Rubbing it ...

Rubbing it ... with something warm, soft and wet is just what the doctor prescribed, and would I lie, honey?


Jumping onto the bed ...

Jumping onto the bed ... his excitement visibly bobbed up and down.

Running on empty ...

Running on empty ... means it time to enliven the relationship.



If it weren't for work ...

If it weren't for work ... there'd be more time for pleasure. (Less money ... but more time :D)

Vanilla ice cream ...

Vanilla ice cream ... may not be unusual but is delicious, much like a familiar partner.


Placing his fingers on ....

Placing his fingers on .... her sensitive spots always yielded results.

Tricks are for kids ...

Tricks are for kids ... you silly rabbit!

For that Elvis Look.......

For that Elvis Look.......you really need a sequined jacket.

When shopping for fresh meat ...

When shopping for fresh meat ... you're unlikely to find it in the Yellow Pages, but you can let your fingers do the walking.


She was a posterchild for ....

She was a posterchild for ... the "future Pixies of the World" campaign.

Nothing is so wonderful as ...

Nothing is so wonderful as ...sex an a Saturday.

I have a craving for...

I have a craving for... a night of romantic sex.

The odds are ...

The odds are ... this isn't the night I'm gonna get it. :(


Forgetting to close the blinds ...

Forgetting to close the blinds ... can add an element of danger to the moment.

Hopping on one foot ...

Hopping on one foot ... would be one helluva tough way to engage in sex.


We rented an adult movie and ...

We rented an adult movie and ... were surprised to see our neighbors were the stars. (oops)

During the Super Bowl ...

During the Super Bowl ... Pats and Cats fans screams of "yes, yes, yes" probably won't be related to sex.


The fire in the fireplace led to ...

...sex on the rug.

The candles on the mantle...

Would make interesting 'toys'. :D




Her husband found her stash of 'toys'...............

...and he ran screaming out the door. :p

Too many weeks of travel...

Too many weeks of travel...left the condom wrapper soiled and crumpled.

Moonlight and roses ...

Moonlight and roses ... are aphrodesiacs for some women (but not me...hate roses)

A hug from a friend...

A hug from a friend ... can do wonders if you're feeling blue.

An erection a day ...

An erection a day ... keeps the Viagra away.

A naughty picture a day...

A naughty picture a day keeps my penis from turning gray.

My car is so old...

that if anyone steals it, they deserve what they get.







I've got underwear older than........

SS..... (you probably) I've got underwear older than........ me !

:p

Lighter fluid is very useful when...

Lighter fluid is very useful when.........................you run out of charcoal lighter fluid :D ( Yes, I KNOW they aren't interchangable......I'm only finishing a sentence, not recommending it! :D:D:D )




I'm really not as foolish as.............

I'm really not as foolish as ... I probably seem.

On the other hand, I may be as ...