I can resist anything, but temptation.

Some have open relationships, some have closed and for some the door is slightly ajar. In a grown up relationship you define your own limits with love and respect. If the latter goes, you have problems.

For your info STO I used to have a fantasy that couldn't be physically realised by my partner. I used to feel like you that at some stage curiosity would win. Truth is that over time this fantasy doesn't interest me anymore. You never know how you will evolve.

Yep, when I went back and re-read that's what it seems...so I wasn't too off track. LOL LOL

Self control? What's that? The older I get the less I have! Wassup with that? :p

Maybe we are just mature enough and have enough self awareness to realize we have none. I think when I was younger I thought it was guts:p

You know what, for a bunch of damn pervs we are all pretty deep, caring and smart group of people

I know I said I was away but I had to jump in here real quick.
STO, you are a good guy and whatever you decide to do is obviously entirely up to you.

I guess you have to weigh whether cheating at the age of 50 and after (I am guessing but I think 25+) years of marriage is worth it.

Chris Rock had an interesting rant about this.
It was called: Your Woman vs. New Pussy or something like that.

He said something about New Pussy doesn't yell at you to do the dishes or take out the garbage or mow the lawn.
But he also said that New Pussy won't take care of you when you are sick, be with you on holidays, cook you your favorite dinner and a whole myriad of other things.

Remember, when your 75 and retired:
If you cheated and got caught - would it be worth it when your all alone and thinking about how you screwed things up to go after that hot chick flirting with you at the copier machine.

If you didn't cheat - You can look over at the person you grew old with while your grandkids ask you how you and grandma met.

Of course it could be indicitive of other problems as well.

Whatever you decide to do, I'm sure it will be the right decision.

Just thought I'd throw my 2-cents (or a whole money bag of change) into the mix.

Sorry for stepping on your loquacious toes Lixy. ;)

I'm off to go hide in my cave again.

As always, good points CK.

Re: Morals be damned or embraced?
 

You seem to be losing sight of something here, STO: monogamy is only a moral dilemma from a viewpoint of one particular set of morals.

That being said, it seems to me that you have adopted that particular set of morals as your own: I respect that, and will not in any way, criticize you for doing so.

However, I will point out that the answer may lie in re-examining this ethical system, and making a desicion (and this decision *must* include the input of your s/o) about whether or not you feel you need to continue along this path.

Then, whtever path you do choose to follow, stick to it.

Re: Morals be damned or embraced?
 

I think you think too much, dude...let's see, you don't get all you want at home, & you're beating yourself up over something you haven't done, but think you might do someday...is that about it? Listen to the man who's rapidly approaching the Golden Number that you specified, you just need a guiltectomy...I'm approaching 30 yrs of monotony...er, monogamy, there's been a couple of close calls but no real violations of my vows, & I don't forsee any in the future...but you & I are men, & prone to slip if the Little Head starts doing the thinking...but I think you might just be alright anyway...after a while, other women can just look at ya & tell that you're married, whether you got a ring on or not...

How's that for a wordy message from me...

Thanks scotz

Real temptation staring you in the face is much different than philosophy. Yes, I have stared down the barrel and walked away, but I have also succumbed. Never went looking, don't want to risk my relationships but certain situations grab me where I live and won't let go.

Your morals are a large part of who you are... you have built them one by one based on your life experiences... thus turning away from your morals... would be akin to turning away from yourself...

This being said.. morals are bound to change over time, a result of experiences that you have yet to live. It is possible in the future that your morals will change... it is called evolution.

Could it be that you are anticipating a "mid-life" crisis?

Mid-life is like between birth and death right? Yup, that's what I'm having. A mid-life crisis.

Wait a !%$damned minute here! How'd you sneak in and pull that soap box from under me?

Ohhhhhhhh Coach! I'm really sorta glad a part of me rubbed off on you! The loquacious part hun........DON'T TOUCH the goodies! What a treat to see you are still around CK! I do miss you.....but I understand!

CHEATING huh?

I should write a book on this topic.......it is so diverse. Seems that "cheating" is in the mind of the beholder regardless of what the official dictionary meaning says. I say.........if you think you are cheating.....you probably are cheating.........be it in cyber or physically! The better question is.........can you live with that knowledge even if you were never found out?

Things that make ya go hmmmmmmmmmmm??????

Can you live with the results if it were found out?hmmmmmmmmmmm

I am a very moral person.... but I've only had one face-to-face Girlfriend (and only 2 total)... but the thought never happened for me.... not really.... it ended badly with her (and I really think she was messing around on me but I'll never know)... so I don't know much else.

I am all for what the other person wants... I don't care either way.. for me... if I am with someone I only want to be with them... its how I am...