Star Wars Gangsta Rap

(Emperor) It's not the east or the west side
(Vader) No it's not
(Emperor) It's not the north or the south side
(Vader) No it's not
(Emperor) It's the dark side
(Vader) You are correct
(Emperor) You can't front on the Empire
To all you Vader haters out there
We'll blow your planet up

1st verse
(Vader) What is thy bidding my master
(Emperor) It's a disaster Skywalker we're after
(Vader) But if he can be turned to the dark side...
(Emperor) Yes he'd be a powerful ally
(Vader) Another dark jedi
He will join us or die

We've got death star 8(x)

Fade-out:
And you know that we got it... Death Star!

(Uncle Owen) Luke!
Get your ass over here right now
and quit monkeying with that damn landspeeder
Where're those two droids I asked you to clean, boy?
Did you clean your room?

(Luke) Uncle Owen, I know I'm on probation
I cleaned the droids
can I go to Tosche Station
I got a layaway on a power converter
but now you're treating me like a scruffy nerf hearder

(Obi-Wan) Luke...
Use the force and run
Go to Dagobah
Go to Dagobah

Luke...
Use the force and run
Go to Dagobah
Go to Dagobah

(Yoda) I'm Yoda I'm a soldja
I'll mold ya then fold ya
I thought I told ya
Don't be unwise judge me not by my size
You won't believe your eyes
Watch the x-wing rise

(Luke) Yoda, why you being a player-hater
You know that I still must confront Lord Vader

(Yoda) But Luke, not ready are you

(Luke) But there's a city in the clouds where
they're keeping my crew
A Jedi's gotta do what a Jedi's gotta do
So now Vader - I'm coming for you

(Luke in x-wing talking)
Yeah, that's right R-2, I just set a new course... we're going to cloud city.
Hmm, that's some mighty good gin-n'-tonic, why don't you mix me up another...
Things're about to get ugly

(Vader) Impressive, now release your anger
You must have sensed your friends were in danger
(Luke) Oww... why'd you slice off my hand
(Vader) Its imperative that you understand
Obi Wan would never bother
telling you about your father
(Luke) He told me enough he told me you killed him
(Vader) Then there's something I must reveal then

I'm your father... I'm your father...
I'm your father... I'm your father...
I'm your father... I'm your father...
I'm your father... I'm your father...

(Han) Knock him out the box Luke, knock him out...
Knock him out the box Luke, knock him out...
Knock him out the box Luke, knock him out...
Knock him out the box Luke.

myyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy bologna has a first name it's o-s-c-a-r
my bologna has a second name it's m-e-y-e-r.
ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
i love to eat it every day
and if you ask me why i'll sayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
cause oscar meyer has a way with b-o-l-o-g-n-a.

"Ocean Breathes Salty"~ MODEST MOUSE

Your body may be gone, I'm gonna carry you in.
In my head, in my heart, in my soul.
And maybe we'll get lucky and we'll both live again.
Well I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Don't think so.

Well that is that and this is this.
You tell me what you want and I'll tell you what you get.
You get away from me. You get away from me.
Collected my belongings and I left the jail.
Well thanks for the time, I needed to think a spell.
I had to think awhile. I had to think awhile.

The ocean breathes salty, won't you carry it in?
In your head, in your mouth, in your soul.
And maybe we'll get lucky and we'll both grow old.
Well I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I hope so.

Well that is that and this is this.
You tell me what you want and I'll tell you what you get.
You get away from me. You get away from me.
Collected my belongings and I left the jail.
Well thanks for the time, I needed to think a spell.
I had to think awhile. I had to think awhile.

Well that is that and this is this.
Will you tell me what you saw and I'll tell you what you missed,
when the ocean met the sky.
You missed when time and life shook hands and said goodbye.
When the earth folded in on itself.
And said "Good luck, for your sake I hope heaven and hell
are really there, but I wouldn't hold my breath."
You wasted life, why wouldn't you waste death?
You wasted life, why wouldn't you waste death?

The ocean breathes salty, won't you carry it in?
In your head, in your mouth, in your soul.
The more we move ahead the more we're stuck in rewind.
Well I don't mind. I don't mind. How the hell could I mind?

Well that is that and this is this.
You tell me what you want and I'll tell you what you get.
You get away from me. You get away from me.

Well that is that and this is this.
Will you tell me what you saw and I'll tell you what you missed,
when the ocean met the sky.
You wasted life, why wouldn't you waste the afterlife?

Can't Fight This Feeling - REO Speedwagon

~~ Our wedding dance song next weekend ~~


I can't fight this feeling any longer.
And yet I'm still afraid to let it flow.
What started out as friendship,
Has grown stronger.
I only wish I had the strength to let it show.

I tell myself that I can't hold out forever.
I said there is no reason for my fear.
Cause I feel so secure when we're together.
You give my life direction,
You make everything so clear.

And even as I wander,
I'm keeping you in sight.
You're a candle in the wind,
On a cold, dark winter's night.
And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might.

And I can't fight this feeling anymore.
I've forgotten what I started fighting for.
It's time to bring this ship into the shore,
And throw away the oars, forever.

Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore.
I've forgotten what I started fighting for.
And if I have to crawl upon the floor,
Come crushing through your door,
Baby, I can't fight this feeling anymore.

My life has been such a whirlwind since I saw you.
I've been running round in circles in my mind.
And it always seems that I'm following you, girl,
Cause you take me to the places,
That I'd known I'd never find.

And even as I wander,
I'm keeping you in sight.
You're a candle in the wind,
On a cold, dark winter's night.
And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might.

And I can't fight this feeling anymore.
I've forgotten what I started fighting for.
It's time to bring this ship into the shore,
And throw away the oars, forever.

Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore.
I've forgotten what I started fighting for.
And if I have to crawl upon the floor,
Come crushing through your door,
Baby, I can't fight this feeling anymore.

Dinah-Moe Humm
 

A true smut song



I couldn't say where she's coming' from,
But I just met a lady named Dinah-Moe Humm

She stroll on over, say look here, bum,
I got a forty dollar bill say you can't make me cum
(Y'jes can't do it)

She made a bet with her sister who's a little dumb
She could prove it any time all men was scum

I don't mind that she called me a bum,
But I knew right away she was really gonna cum
(So I got down to it)

I whipped off her bloomers'n stiffened my thumb
An' applied rotation on her sugar plum

I poked'n stroked till my wrist got numb
But I still didn't hear no Dinah-Moe Humm,
Dinah-Moe Humm

Dinah-Moe Humm
Dinah-Moe Humm
Where this Dinah-Moe
Comin' from
Done spent three hours
An' I ain't got a crumb
From the Dinah-Moe, Dinah-Moe, Dinah-Moe
From the Dinah-Moe Humm

I got a spot that gets me hot
But you ain't been to it
I got a spot that gets me hot
But you ain't been to it
I got a spot that gets me hot
But you ain't been to it
I got a spot that gets me hot
But you ain't been to it
'Cause I can't get into it
Unless I get out of it
An' I gotta get out of it
Before I get into it
'Cause I never get into it
Unless I get out of it
An' I gotta be out of it
To get myself into it

(She looked over at me with a glazed eye
And some bovine perspiration on her upper lip area
And she said...)

Just get me wasted
An' you're half-way there
'Cause if my mind's tore up
Then my body don't care

I rubbed my chinny-chin-chin
An' said my-my-my
What sort of thing
Might this lady get high upon?

I checked out her sister
Who was holdin' the bet
An' wondered what kind of trip
The young lady was on

The forty dollar bill didn't matter no more
When her sister got nekkid an' laid on the floor
She said Dinah-Moe might win the bet
But she could use a little ------- if I wasn't done yet

I told her...
Just because the sun
Want a place in the sky
No reason to assume
I wouldn't give her a try

So I pulled on her hair
Got her legs in the air
An' asked if she had any cooties on there

(Whaddya mean cooties! No cooties on me!)

She was buns-up kneelin'
BUNS UP!
I was wheelin' an dealin'
WHEELIN' AN' DEALIN' AN OOOOH!
She surrended to the feelin'
SHE SWEETLY SURRENDERED
An' she started in to squealin'

Dinah-Moe watched from the edge of the bed
With her lips just a-twitchin' an' her face gone red
Some drool rollin' down
From the edge of her chin
While she spied the condition
Her sister was in
She quivered 'n quaked
An' clutched at herself
While her sister made a joke
'Bout her mental health
'Till Dinah-Moe finally
Did give in
But I told her
All she really needed
Was some discipline...

Kiss my aura...Dora...
M-M-M...it's real angora
Would y'all like some more-a?
Right here on the flora?
An' how 'bout you, Fauna?
Y'wanna?

MMM...sound like y'might be chokin' on somethin'

Did you say you want some more?
Well, here's some more...

MMM, sure...listen
D'you think I could interest you
In a pair of zircon-encrusted tweezers?

MMM...tweezers!
Here, lemme sterilize 'em...
Gimme your lighter...

I couldn't say where she's coming' from,
But I just met a lady named Dinah-Moe Humm

She stroll on over, say look here, bum,
I got a forty dollar bill say you can't make me cum
(Y'jes can't do it)

I whipped off her bloomers'n stiffened my thumb
An' applied rotation on her sugar plum

I poked'n stroked till my wrist got numb
An' you know I heard some Dinah-Moe Humm,
Dinah-Moe Humm

Dinah-Moe
Dinah-Moe
Dinah-Moe
Dinah-Moe

I'm wishing on a star
To follow where you are
I'm wishing on a dream
To follow what it means

I'm wishing on a star
To follow where you are
I'm wishing on a dream
To follow what it means

And I wish on all the rainbows that I see
I wish on all the people who really dream
And I'm wishing on tomorrow, praying it'll come
And I'm wishing on all the lovin' we've ever done

I never thought I'd see
A time when you would be
So far away from home
So far away from me

Just think of all the moments that we'd spent
I just can't let you go, for me you were meant
And I didn't mean to hurt you, but I know
That in the game of love you reap what you sow

I feel it's time we should make up, baby
I feel it's time for us to get back together
And make the best of things, oh, baby
When we're together, whether or never

I feel it's time we should make up, baby
I feel it's time for us to get back together
And make the best of things, oh, baby
When we're together, whether or never

I'm wishing on a star
To follow where you are
I'm wishing on a dream
To follow what it means

And I wish on all the rainbows that I see
I wish on all the people we've ever been
And I'm hopin' on all the days to come and days to go
And I'm hopin' on days of lovin' you so

I'm wishing on a star
To follow where you are
I'm wishing on a star
Oh?h?h? And I wish on all the rainbows that I see

I'm wishing on a star
To follow where you are
I'm wishing on a star
And I wish on all the rainbows that I see

I'm wishing on a star
To follow where you are
I'm wishing on a star
oh, oh, ah, ah

I'm wishing on a star, oh,oh
To follow where you are
I'm wishing on a star, baby
To follow wherever you might be

Wishing in a star, oh, oh
To follow where you are, oh, oh, ah, ah

Hehe...Dinah-Moe Humm...classic :)

Frank Zappa - Cosmik Debris
The mystery man came over
And he said "I'm outta sight!"
He said for a nominal service charge
I could reach nirvana tonight
If I was ready, willing and able
To pay him his regular fee
He would drop all the rest of
His pressing affairs and devote
His attention to me

But I said "Look here brother
who you jiving with that cosmik debris?
Now who you jiving with that cosmik debris?
Look here brother, don't waste your time on me"

The mystery man got nervous
And he fidget around a bit
He reached in the pocket of his mystery robe
And he whipped out a shaving kit
Now I thought it was a razor
And a can of foaming goo
But he told me right then when the top popped open
There was nothin' his box won't do
With the oil of Aphrodite, and the dust of the Grand Wazoo
He said "You might not believe this, little fella
But it'll cure your asthma too"

And I said "Look here brother
Who you jiving with that cosmik debris?
Now what kind of a guru are you, anyway?
Look here brother, don't waste your time on me"
(Don't waste your time)

"I've got troubles of my own", I said
"And you can't help me out
So, take your meditations and your preparations
And ram it up your snout!"
"But I got the crystal ball", he said
And held it to the ligh
So I snatched it, all away from him
And I showed him how to do it right

I wrapped a newspaper 'round my head
So I looked like I was deep
I said some mumbo-jumbo, then
I told him he was going to sleep
I robbed his rings and pocketwatch
And everything else I found
I had that sucker hypnotized
He couldn't even make a sound
I proceeded to tell him his future, then
As long as he was hanging around
I said "The price of meat has just gone up
And your old lady has just gone down!"

And I said "Look here brother-who you
Jiving with that cosmik debris?
Now is that a real poncho or is that a Sears poncho?
Don't you know, you could make more money as a butcher?
So, don't waste your time on me"
Don't waste it, don't waste your time on me
(Shanti)

A perfect song for a conversation I just had....


Cold Play~ Fix You

When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try
to Fix you

And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
If you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try
to Fix you

Blue On Black
by Kenny Wayne Shepherd

Night, falls,
I'm alone
Skin, yeah,
chilled me to the bone
You, turned and you ran,
oh, slipped from the edge of my hand

Blue on black,
tears on a river
Push on a shove,
it don't mean much
Whisper on a scream,
doesn't change a thing
Don't bring you back
Blue on black

Blind, oh,
now I see
truth, lies,
and in between
Wrong,
can't be undone
Slipped,
from the tip of your tongue

Blue on black,
tears on a river
Push on a shove,
it don't mean much
Whisper on a scream,
doesn't change a thing
Don't bring you back
Blue on black

nat king cole

L is for the way you look at me
O is for the only one I see
V is very, very extraordinary
E is even more than anyone that you adore can

Love is all that I can give to you
Love is more than just a game for two
Two in love can make it
Take my heart and please don't break it
Love was made for me and you


L is for the way you look at me
O is for the only one I see
V is very, very extraordinary
E is even more than anyone that you adore can

Love is all that I can give to you
Love is more than just a game for two
Two in love can make it
Take my heart and please don't break it
Love was made for me and you
Love was made for me and you
Love was made for me and you

Banditos--The Refreshments
This is the coolest song, apparently about bank robbery lol I just like the way the music is

So just how far down do you wanna go?
And we could talk it out over a cup of joe
And you could look deep into my eyes like I was a supermodel.
uh huh

Well it's you and me baby no one else we can trust
We'll say nothing to no one, no how or we bust
And never crack a smile or flinch or cry for nobody.
huh uh

CHORUS
Well give your ID card to the border guard.
Yeah your alias says you’re Capt. Jean-Luc Picard
Of the United Federation of Planets
'Cuz he won't speak English anyway
Everybody knows that the world is full of stupid people
So meet me at the mission at midnight, we'll divvy up there.
Everybody knows that the world is full of stupid people
Well I got the pistol so I'll keep the pesos.
Yeah and that seems fair.

So put the sugar in the tank of the sheriff's car
And slash the deputy's tires and they won't get very far
When they finally get the word that there's been a hold up.
uh huh

ROCKET IN MY POCKET

I got a rocket in my pocket and a roll in my walk
Baby don’t you bore me with your south forty charm
There ain’t nothing you can tell me I don’t already know
I got a rocket in my pocket and I’m raring to go
Let’s go someplace where we can rock a bit
I got a rocket in my pocket and the fuse is lit

Two in one's polish three in one is oil
A lot of lip service makes my bad blood boil
Didn’t come here to listen gonna split this scene
I got a rocket in my pocket and a hole in my jeans
Let’s go somewhere so we can rock a bit
I got a rocket in my pocket and the fuse is lit

You better get me down and get the signal right
Or there will be no rocking tomorrow night
There ain’t nothing you can tell me I don’t already know
I got a rocket in my pocket and I’m raring to go
Let’s go someplace so we can rock a bit
I got a rocket in my pocket and the fuse is lit

Ryan Shupe & Rubberband - Dream Big Lyrics

When you cry be sure to dry your eyes, cause better days are sure to come.
And when you smile be sure to smile wide, and dont let them know that they have won.
And when you walk, walk with pride, and dont show the hurt inside, because the pain will soon be gone.

Chorus:
And when you dream, dream big, as big as the ocean blue. Cause when you dream it might come true. When you dream, dream big.

And when you laugh be sure to laugh out loud, cause it will carry all your cares away.
And when you see, see the beauty all around and in yourself, and it will help you feel okay.
And when you pray, pray for strength to help to carry on when the troubles come your way.

Chorus

When you cry be sure to dry your eyes, cause better days are sure to come.
And when you smile be sure to smile wide, and dont let them know that they have won.
And when you laugh be sure to laugh out loud, cause it will carry all your cares away.
And when you see, see the beauty all around and in yourself, and it will help you feel okay.
And when you pray, pray for strength to help to carry on when the troubles come your way.

Elton John, "Blessed"

Hey you, you’re a child in my head
You haven’t walked yet
Your first words have yet to be said
But I swear you’ll be blessed

I know you’re still just a dream
Your eyes might be green
Or the bluest that I’ve ever seen
Anyway you’ll be blessed

And you, you’ll be blessed
You’ll have the best
I promise you that
I’ll pick a star from the sky
Pull your name from a hat
I promise you that, promise you that, promise you that
You’ll be blessed

I need you before I’m too old
To have and to hold
To walk with you and watch you grow
And know that you’re blessed

Origin of Love~

When the earth was still flat
And the clouds made of fire
And mountains stretched up to the sky
Sometimes higher
Folks roamed the earth
Like big rolling kegs
They had two sets of arms
They had two sets of legs
They had two faces peering
Out of one giant head
So they could watch all around them
As they talked while they read
And they never knew nothing of love
It was before...
The origin of love
The origin of love

And there were three sexes then
One that looked like two men
Glued up back to back
Called the children of the sun
And similar in shape and girth
Were the children of the earth
They looked like
Two girls rolled up in one
And the children of the moon
Was like a fork shoved on a spoon
They were part sun, part earth
Part daughter, part son

The origin of love

Now the gods grew quite scared
Of our strength and defiance
And Thor said,
"I'm gonna kill them all with my hammer,
Like I killed the giants"
But Zeus said, "No-
You better let me
Use my lightning like scissors
Like I cut the legs off the whales
Dinosaurs into lizards"
Then he grabbed up some bolts
He let out a laugh
Said, "I'll split them right down the middle
Gonna cut them right up in half"
And then storm clouds gathered above
Into great balls of fire

And then fire shot down
From the sky in bolts
Like shining blades of a knife
And it ripped right through the flesh
Of the children of the sun and the moon and the earth
And some Indian god
Sewed the up into a hole
Pulled it round to our belly
To remind us of the price we pay
And Osiris and the gods of the Nile
Gathered up a big storm
To blow a hurricane
To scatter us away
In a flood of wind and rain
A sea of tidal waves
To wash us all away
And if we don't behave
They'll cut us down again
And we'll be hopping 'round on one foot
And looking through one eye

Last time I saw you
We had just split in two
You were looking at me
I was looking at you
You had a way so familiar
But I could not recognize
'Cause you had blood on your face
I had blood in my eyes
But I could swear by your expression
That the pain down in your soul
Was the same as the one down in mine
That's the pain
That cuts a straight line down through the heart
We call it love
We wrapped our arms around each other
Tried to shove ourselves back together
We were making love
Making love
It was a cold, dark evening
Such a long time ago
When by the mighty hand of Jove
It was the sad story how we became
Lonely two-legged creatures
It's the story of the origin of love
That's the origin of love

The origin of love
The origin of love
The origin of love