2775

these are great, should have named it 1 million jokes!

i am on the floor lauphing hard you all.

have a great one

-mike

__________________
Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." --Albert Einstein

2776

A truck driver was going down a steep incline when, at the foot of the hill, he was able to make out a couple having sex in the middle of the road. Five times on his descent he sounded his horn, but they didn't move. He finally brought the truck' to a halt inches from them. The truck driver got out and stormed: "What the hell's the matter with you two?.Didn't you hear me? You could have been killed!" The man replied nonchalantly: "Listen, I was coming, she was coming, and you were coming. You were the only one with brakes

__________________
"I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath'. For three years my husband and I slept on bunk beds."

2777

If men got pregnant:

Morning sickness would rank as the
nation's number one health problem

Maternity leave would last for two years with full pay

Children would be kept in hospital until toilet trained

Natural childbirth would become obsolete

All methods of birth control would be 100 per cent effective

Men would be eager to talk about commitment

There would be a cure for stretch marks

They'd serve beer instead of coffee at antenatal classes

Men wouldn't think twins were so cute

Sons would have to be home from dates by 10 p.m.

__________________
"I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath'. For three years my husband and I slept on bunk beds."

2778

nevermind!

__________________
"I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath'. For three years my husband and I slept on bunk beds."

2779

don't wanna offend anyone

__________________
"I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath'. For three years my husband and I slept on bunk beds."

2780






*snickers and erases this post just cause*

__________________
"I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath'. For three years my husband and I slept on bunk beds."

2781

LOL...will stop...am sorry they just cracked me up

__________________
"I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath'. For three years my husband and I slept on bunk beds."

2782

10 WAYS TO KNOW
YOU'VE HAD WILD SEX

1. Your mattress has turned into a giant sponge.

2. It takes five minutes to unknot your bodies.


3. An earthquake of 5.4 on the Richter Scale is recorded in your area.


4. The cat's exhausted from just watching you.


5. A trampoline company has to come to adjust your bedsprings.


6. You've both gone down one clothing size.


7. You cancel your chiropractic appointment. There's nothing left to adjust.


8. You have to breathe into a brown paper bag.


9. Boy, are you hungry!


10. You're absolutely satisfied yet uncontrollably horny at the same time.

__________________
"I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath'. For three years my husband and I slept on bunk beds."

2783

Great visit with my cousin and his little guys . . . I wish I didn't have to work so I could spend more time with them.

2784

*taps my fingers and hmmms* should really go to bed i guess

__________________
"I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath'. For three years my husband and I slept on bunk beds."

2785

God i know ya'll have to be getting sick of me....must be scary to see me posting so much LOL


*WOOOHOOO I HIT 200*

__________________
"I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath'. For three years my husband and I slept on bunk beds."

2786

Big yellow smile, we know you're posting!

2787

am still here...should really sleep but not sure if i can give up this thread yet LOL

__________________
"I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath'. For three years my husband and I slept on bunk beds."

2788

plop plop fizz fizz, oh what a relief it is...

__________________
"I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath'. For three years my husband and I slept on bunk beds."

2789

I do believe i have gone crazy due to lack of sleep

__________________
"I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath'. For three years my husband and I slept on bunk beds."