11-19-2001, 07:58 PM
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Vampyre/ Knight
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Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: The Darkness that encompasses the mind just before
Posts: 3,828
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This has been posted before, but now there are additions!
Counting Calories
It has been known for many years that sex is good exercise, but until recently nobody had made a scientific study of the caloric expenditure of different sexual activities. Now after original and proprietary research they are proud to present the results.
REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent....................... 12 Calories
Without her consent.................... 187 Calories
OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands........................ 8 Calories
With one hand.......................... 12 Calories
With your teeth........................ 85 Calories
PUTTING ON A PRESERVATIVE:
With an erection....................... 6 Calories
Without an erection.................... 315 Calories
PRELIMINARIES:
Trying to find the clitoris............ 8 Calories
Trying to find the G-Spot.............. 92 Calories
POSITIONS:
Missionary............................. 12 Calories
69 lying down.......................... 78 Calories
69 standing up......................... 112 Calories
Wheelbarrow............................ 216 Calories
Doggy Style............................ 326 Calories
Italian chandelier..................... 912 Calories
ORGASMING:
Real................................... 112 Calories
False.................................. 315 Calories
POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging................... 18 Calories
Getting up immediately................. 36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately......816 Calories
GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are:
20-29 years old........................ 36 Calories
30-39 years old............................ 80 Calories
40-49 years old............................ 124 Calories
50-59 years old............................ 972 Calories
60-69 years old............................ 2916 Calories
70 and over............................. Results are still pending
DRESSING UP AFTERWARDS:
Calmly................................. 32 Calories
In a hurry............................. 98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door... 1218 Calories
With your wife/husband knocking at the door....3521 Calories!
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11-20-2001, 12:54 AM
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Turn it up!
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Join Date: May 2001
Location: Music City
Posts: 9,293
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new game
Who wants to play? mefirstmefirst!
__________________
Plug me into somethin'
If the theory does not conform to the facts, then the facts must be discarded.
No good deed ever goes unpunished
Never argue with an idiot. He'll drag you down to his level, & beat you with experience.
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11-20-2001, 09:46 PM
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~*Forget Me Not*~
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Join Date: May 2001
Location: In hearts gone by....
Posts: 6,756
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LOL....too funny!!! 
__________________
_______________________
*Diva*
"Never shall I forget the time I spent with you. Please
continue to be my friend, as you will always find me yours."
Ludwig van Beethoven (1770-1827)
"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."
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11-20-2001, 09:57 PM
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~*Forget Me Not*~
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Join Date: May 2001
Location: In hearts gone by....
Posts: 6,756
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I want this bath toy for xmas........please!!!!
__________________
_______________________
*Diva*
"Never shall I forget the time I spent with you. Please
continue to be my friend, as you will always find me yours."
Ludwig van Beethoven (1770-1827)
"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."
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11-21-2001, 07:40 AM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: North Australia
Posts: 17,686
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If I give you one for Xmas, can I have video of you
changing the batteries?
__________________
Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating
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11-21-2001, 06:00 PM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: North Australia
Posts: 17,686
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500
500 for diva
This piercing thing,, a warning
__________________
Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating
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11-21-2001, 08:43 PM
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~*Forget Me Not*~
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Join Date: May 2001
Location: In hearts gone by....
Posts: 6,756
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Talk about an ugly pin cushion!!!!!!!!!!!!! lmao!!!!!
Thanks Oldfart!!! 
__________________
_______________________
*Diva*
"Never shall I forget the time I spent with you. Please
continue to be my friend, as you will always find me yours."
Ludwig van Beethoven (1770-1827)
"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."
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11-21-2001, 09:33 PM
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~*Forget Me Not*~
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Join Date: May 2001
Location: In hearts gone by....
Posts: 6,756
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How to please one another...
__________________
_______________________
*Diva*
"Never shall I forget the time I spent with you. Please
continue to be my friend, as you will always find me yours."
Ludwig van Beethoven (1770-1827)
"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."
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11-21-2001, 10:02 PM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: colorado
Posts: 97
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Gee Diva,you make us men seem so shallow,hehehe
true but bad lol |
11-21-2001, 10:04 PM
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~*Forget Me Not*~
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Join Date: May 2001
Location: In hearts gone by....
Posts: 6,756
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LOL. BigBob....I am only stating the facts!!!!
__________________
_______________________
*Diva*
"Never shall I forget the time I spent with you. Please
continue to be my friend, as you will always find me yours."
Ludwig van Beethoven (1770-1827)
"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."
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11-21-2001, 10:05 PM
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~*Forget Me Not*~
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Join Date: May 2001
Location: In hearts gone by....
Posts: 6,756
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But sometimes...we ladies do have the upper hand!!!! 
__________________
_______________________
*Diva*
"Never shall I forget the time I spent with you. Please
continue to be my friend, as you will always find me yours."
Ludwig van Beethoven (1770-1827)
"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."
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11-21-2001, 10:10 PM
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~*Forget Me Not*~
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Join Date: May 2001
Location: In hearts gone by....
Posts: 6,756
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__________________
_______________________
*Diva*
"Never shall I forget the time I spent with you. Please
continue to be my friend, as you will always find me yours."
Ludwig van Beethoven (1770-1827)
"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."
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11-21-2001, 10:39 PM
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~*Forget Me Not*~
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Join Date: May 2001
Location: In hearts gone by....
Posts: 6,756
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Which condom is right for you???
Nike condoms:Just do it!
Toyota condoms:Oh what a feeling!
Diet Pepsi condoms:You got the right one baby! Uh huh!
Pringles condoms:Once you pop.... You can't stop!
Mentos condoms:The freshmaker!
Secret condoms:Strong enough for a man, made for a woman. Chevy condoms:Like a rock!
New York lotto condoms:Cause hey.....ya never know.
KFC condoms:Finger lickin good!
Coca Cola condoms:The real thing!
Lays condoms:Betcha cant have just one.
Ruffles condoms:Get your own bag!
Campbell soup condoms: Mmm Mmm better!
AT&T condoms: Reach out and touch someone.
Bounty condoms:The quicker picker upper.
Energizer condoms: It keeps going and going....
Taco Bell condoms:Make a run for the border!
MCI condoms:For friends and family.
7up condoms:Make 7 up yours!
Doublemint condoms: Double your pleasure Double your fun!
Delta condoms: Delta is ready when you are!
Toyota condoms:I love whatcha do for me!
McDonalds condoms:Have you had your break today?
McDonalds condoms:Would you like that SUPER SIZED?
And Diva don't wear condoms!
__________________
_______________________
*Diva*
"Never shall I forget the time I spent with you. Please
continue to be my friend, as you will always find me yours."
Ludwig van Beethoven (1770-1827)
"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."
Last edited by Lovediva : 11-21-2001 at 10:42 PM.
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11-21-2001, 11:46 PM
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Turn it up!
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Join Date: May 2001
Location: Music City
Posts: 9,293
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Re: how to please
Just cuz men are easy to work with doesn't mean we're shallow... hey, for me, you don't even hafta bring beer!
__________________
Plug me into somethin'
If the theory does not conform to the facts, then the facts must be discarded.
No good deed ever goes unpunished
Never argue with an idiot. He'll drag you down to his level, & beat you with experience.
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11-22-2001, 09:58 PM
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~*Forget Me Not*~
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Join Date: May 2001
Location: In hearts gone by....
Posts: 6,756
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Play us a dong of the Piano Man
__________________
_______________________
*Diva*
"Never shall I forget the time I spent with you. Please
continue to be my friend, as you will always find me yours."
Ludwig van Beethoven (1770-1827)
"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."
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