Well I have to see the psychiatrist/psychologist to get my meds (and the insurance I've apparently got requires me to go to one of them instead of a general practioner).

As far as therapist, I've gotten a lot of good help and tools through the ones I've seen. Plus, for some of the worst of my problems, I'd rather talk to someone that isn't a close friend (plus, in some cases, the friends are part of the problem)

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To those that understand, I extend my hand. To the doubtful I demand, take me as I am!

Makes sense for the meds, and I can understand that friends, while meaning well, just make the problem worse. I was stating that I never really found a use for them. If they're helping you, by all means, keep going to them. I think I can safely say that everyone here wants you to get better, not worse.

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"BOY: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses? GIRL: Will he offer me his mouth? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his teeth? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his jaws? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his hunger? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Again, will he offer me his hunger? BOY: Yes! GIRL: Yes. BOY: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses? GIRL: Yes. BOY: I bet you say that to all the boys!" -Meatloaf

Yeah, finding the right mental health care professional can be as much as a crap shoot as finding the right medication.

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On the kinkometer, my kink measures as a sine wave.

I hope so as well......You will be in my thoughts and prayers. I will pray that you find the help that need........XOXO Shadowsfate XOXO
Please don't give up...you have a life to get back to !!!

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What is essential is invisible to the eye
Only with the heart can one see rightly.

Even if I wanted to give up (and I don't), I have many good friends that won't let me, including the one that kicked my ass at mini-golf yesterday (she's already threatened me with a rematch )

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To those that understand, I extend my hand. To the doubtful I demand, take me as I am!

Glad you got the insurance and can get the meds you need. Prayers will continue for you ... and, when you need a friend ... you've got a bunch of them here.

Well, actually, looks like I didn't get the insurance. The unemployment extension went through just in time to make sure I didn't get my insurance (yet, at least). Which means I got to run out of the main anti-depressant I was on this last Tuesday.


And now, on top of the depression, my back went out bad enough to cause me to go to the ER (I knew it was going to happen eventually, just was hoping it would hold off). Basically, I felt like someone had taken a hold of my spine and was just squeezing it. Couldn't stand, sit, lay down, nothing. Fortunately I have a good friend near by who was willing to put her evening plans to the side to take me to the ER and wait the entire 2 hours til they released me.

Right now, I have no idea exactly what's going on with my back, but I have my guesses (probably either the disc that I was told was "unhealthy" back in 2002 finally went, or maybe one further up did). Considering that the 2002 surgery was on the 3rd disc from the bottom, and the 4th disc from the bottom bulged into the spinal cord requiring surgery in 2005, and the bottom two were 'unhealthy" (they didn't want to touch those at all because of all the nerves in the area and the fact that they hadn't bulged or herniated), I'm probably lucky I can get around as well as I do most day

More news to come, when I know what's going.

Any rambling, spelling errors and the like are all brought to you curtesy of toradol and demerol

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To those that understand, I extend my hand. To the doubtful I demand, take me as I am!

holy shit.

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On the kinkometer, my kink measures as a sine wave.

Ok, it looks like I WILL be getting some sort of insurance to cover my hospital stay in July and the ER visit last night, but it's likely to have a big deductible. My Human Services case manager also gave me a few other people to check with to help cover the amount I'll owe. She also suggested that I look into disability also (and considering this is like the 6th time someone has suggested disability, it's probably a sign of what I should be doing).

And provided that Congress doesn't extend my unemployment benefits again, starting in September, I'll full medical without a deductible.

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To those that understand, I extend my hand. To the doubtful I demand, take me as I am!

ok, new update. Just got off of the phone with my case worker and things have changed. July and August hospital bills are fully covered, but it sounds like September I'll have some sort of co-pay to pay due to unemployment. Basically just reversed the situation from before

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To those that understand, I extend my hand. To the doubtful I demand, take me as I am!

Doctor's appointment tomorrow, but I don't expect to have any new news about my back then. Hopefully he'll order an MRI and go from there. Plus I'll be talking to him about anti-depressants, since I've been without my main one for over a week now, thanks to the poor mental health program in my area. They refuse to even see me until I can prove I can pay (which I can now do) and even then, I'm looking at at least severals weeks before I can even get an appointment to see one of their doctors. I'll just end-run around that and talk to my family doctor about it (I've tried with him before about anti-depressants, after my first Mental Health ward visit back in 2002 or 2003, and was on Wellbutrin until I couldn't afford the meds anymore).

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To those that understand, I extend my hand. To the doubtful I demand, take me as I am!

If they're going to screw you over, couldn't they at least try and make it so you also ejoyed it?

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On the kinkometer, my kink measures as a sine wave.

Sorry, reach arounds are not covered by any insurance. Neither is lube.

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"BOY: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses? GIRL: Will he offer me his mouth? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his teeth? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his jaws? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his hunger? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Again, will he offer me his hunger? BOY: Yes! GIRL: Yes. BOY: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses? GIRL: Yes. BOY: I bet you say that to all the boys!" -Meatloaf

Well, that's state government for you, though my actually case worker really really tried everything she could to help me out, I think I talked to her 3 times in an hour as she cleared several ideas through her supervisor. but the upshot is is that my psych ward stay in July and my ER visit last Sunday (as well my doctor's visit this morning, my meds he prescribed, my chiropractor visit this afternoon, and upcoming optometrist visit) are all paid for. In fact, my case worker said get as much checked out as you can before the end of August, just in case I can't get nearly as much coverage come September.

And, as for the doctor visit, he put me on a muscle relaxant, an anti-inflammitory, and a different (cheaper, since Iowa is picky about how much they'll pay for meds) anti-depressant. And I definitely need the muscle relaxant, after all the running around I had to do today (including getting my boy registered for school ). And since my boy, only a day back after 2 months with his mom, has asked to "help" make supper (grilled Ranch burgers, something he has been looking forward to for a while), I can take a couple of my meds and relax, lol

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To those that understand, I extend my hand. To the doubtful I demand, take me as I am!

Well, that's some good news at least.

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"BOY: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses? GIRL: Will he offer me his mouth? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his teeth? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his jaws? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his hunger? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Again, will he offer me his hunger? BOY: Yes! GIRL: Yes. BOY: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses? GIRL: Yes. BOY: I bet you say that to all the boys!" -Meatloaf