A while ago—a long while ago—I had an idea for a story. I began, but life got messy, kids got born, and walls got painted. When I eventually came back to it I couldn’t seem to take it anywhere; I kept re-writing and changing but it was stale. The only thing I never changed was the style—it’s first person perspective (which is fun to write) and second person narrative, a narrative that fascinates me—I just love the way it sucks me right in (me the reader, not the writer).
So.
The story is lame and I’m stuck. I begin thinking about other second person narrative stories I’ve read, what I might cannibalize from them. There aren’t many, unless you count instruction manuals, but there used to be these choose your own adventure stories. I don’t know if they still do this stuff anymore with books—they probably do, I
hope they do—I know they have games like that, but if you don’t know what they are the name is pretty self explanatory: you pick a direction at a key point in the story—explore the creepy mansion(p.36) or follow the light you saw in the woods(p.45), tell your best friend about the secret door(p.15) or don’t(next page)—and lead the tale in the direction you want. As a kid, I always went back and re-read the book, making different choices until I had read every possible scenario.
I doubt I’m the first person to do an erotic story like this, but it’s the first time and erotic story is doin’
me like this. And I saw a problem right away with the perspective: I’ve automatically excluded a woman from being the object or addressee, what with all the ‘your cock’-s and all. (sorry girls, but if you use your imaginations … :D) To make it worse, the style of the writing is awkward, switching as it does between first and second person, thought and speech, even changing tenses at least once so far. I have abused the uses of punctuation and grammar. There are things implied and hinted at. Some things you will have to figure out for yourself with clues. And there is only one choice to make after all. I wanted to do more but it was turning into
War and Peace—kinda like this foreword.:p The idea did jump-start my imagination, though.
I freely admit I broke many rules. Frankly, it may be confusing although I hope not. Rather then just tell a story, I wanted to create a mood, set a scene, make it intimate. To paraphrase—a story not only of sight and sound but of mind. To that end I also broke it into sections. O-intermissions if you will. Plus I haven’t finished it yet.
I ask only this ... try to read it as if it were a voice-over or a letter, don’t be too hard on me for the rules I broke, and that if you can, if your browser has an option for it(I don’t know if they all do)—indulge me and please set your text size to small.
As always,
criticism is welcome.
Thanks. ~x~
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