It had been a full week since Victoria showed up here on the island, rather unexpectantly. And yet, my ex-fiancee - the woman who once ripped my heart out and humiliated me in front of my entire family - was still here.
I look back and am surprised at how I treated Victoria when she first arrived on the island. I am about the least argumentive person you could ever come across. I don’t like trouble, and I absolutely hate confrontations.
Yet when I saw Victoria for the first time in nine years last week, I let loose an amount of verbal venom and rage I never thought possible. It could have been a lot worse, too, if not for the simple fact that Lindsay was there and I didn’t want to go off the deep end in front of her.
Lindsay was my little sweetheart, and the last thing I wanted to do was lose total control in front of her. But if I did - considering that my outburst had been directed at Victoria - I would have had ample reason to. That was not me, though - or the type of person I am. So the things I did manage to get out were pretty shocking to me.
I’m still a bit confused why after letting my feelings be known that day, I offered to let Victoria spend the night on the island. Was it because she was in desperate need of a change of clothes, and a shower? She had been soaked - for whatever reason - during her speed-boat trek from Lima to the island. Was it because after such a long airline flight, I thought she deserved some rest? Or... did I invite my ex-fiancee to stay because it was the “Jeremy thing” to do?
Even though I hated this woman for nine years - day-in and day-out - I actually felt guilty after talking down to her the way I did. That was definitely not the type of person I wanted to be. I have always treated others with the utmost amount of respect - especially women.
For the first time in my life, though, I had raised my voice in anger at a woman. This was something that I had long prided myself in never doing. For all of my 28 years on this planet, I had been too nice and too passive for, in many cases, my own good. I was just now starting to realize that this was a problem for me. A big problem, in fact.
Victoria absolutely destroyed my will to live at one point, yet I invited her to stay on the island overnight last week. I felt guilty berating her in the way I did. That just doesn’t seem right, considering our history.
Even worse, Victoria is still here seven days later.
Lindsay had a new friend.
That was really my only reason for allowing Victoria to stay on the island this long. I was doing it for Lindsay’s sake. For whatever reason, she and Victoria were getting along wonderfully together. Maybe it was because Victoria had so many of those “silly, little stories” about me to share with her. Lindsay was getting a real kick out of hearing what I had been like as a teen-ager.
My more passive nature had not allowed me to step forward yet and tell Lindsay that Victoria being here on the island was really not good for my psyche. Each time I seen her, I was immediately reminded of all those years of extreme pain and sorrow I experienced because of the way she had left me. But that really wasn’t the worst thing of all.
Try this on for size - Victoria (my ex-fiancee; a person I really wanted nothing to do with anymore) and Lindsay (for all intents and purposes my current fiancee, who I loved very much) were both physically attracted to each other.
That would be the equivalent of your horrible ex-wife and your lovely new bride wanting to sneak off to the broom closet so they can have some “private time” with each other.
How sick and twisted is that?
Yet I had not said a word to Lindsay about it. She did not realize that these feelings were going through my mind. Perhaps she should have, but I did have to take her age into account. Lindsay was only 19 and was not very experienced in relationships or the ways of the world. She had no idea that seeing her and Victoria together was warping my mind.
Of course, I have bragged in recent chapters that Lindsay was all grown-up now, and very mature. In many ways, she was. But in reality, Lindsay hadn’t crossed the finish line yet. She still had to complete the final lap.
I do not know where this was going between them, but I was prepared to let things play out. All of the girls I had brought with me to the island - Lindsay, Devon, Christina, Lisa, Amy and Stephanie - their pleasure and happiness was much more important to me than my own.
None moreso than Lindsay, which should be obvious. If she wanted Victoria to stay, Victoria would stay. If it made Lindsay happy for Victoria to be here, I would be happy too (very begrudgingly, though).

* * *

These thoughts were swirling throughout my head as I sat upon the sun-drenched beach on this Wednesday afternoon. The tide was not as high today as it usually was. Still, the tranquil sound of the incoming waves as they rolled onto the beach was most relaxing. There was not a single cloud in the sky; it was blue for as far as the eye could see. The air was soft and pure, and had that tropical smell to it which I found so very intoxicating.
If I were to turn and listen carefully, I could hear the island’s biggest waterfall - which was a majestic sight to behold - in the distance. The scene was so very peaceful and languid here that it could easily put me to sleep.
The island really had a lot to offer. In addition to the sprawling beaches and various waterfalls, there was the sheer beauty of the forest, the grandeur of a dormant volcano and the picturesque views atop high-steeped peaks and cliffs.
But nothing could quite compare to the beaches, which were a wonderful place to heal jaggled nerves. I could sit here for hours and simply meditate, and feel much better because of it. If I were to stay here all day long, I would later witness the sun sinking into the Pacific Ocean amidst a blaze of glorious tropical colors. That was, without a doubt, the most stunning sight of all on the island.
“What are you doing?”
Well... six things were more stunning than the sunset.
All of them had breasts, of course.
I had been relaxing and was so much at ease with myself that I did not even realize that I had company until those words were spoken. The sound startled me, but I smiled after turning my head and noticing that the beautiful, luscious Devon had decided to grace me with her presence.
Dressed in a multi-colored bikini top and a grass skirt, Devon looked like a true islander. She even had a ring of pretty flowers in her hair, giving her that impression even more. I just had to give her a second smile, based solely on her physical appearance and the way she was dressed.
“I’m just enjoying the day, sweetheart,” I quietly said, answering her question. Devon took a seat beside me on the beach as I added, “What’s not to enjoy about this island?”
“It sure is beautiful,” Devon told me, gazing out into the open ocean. “I never want to leave this place.” She linked her left arm with my right, and then smiled at me. “What are you thinking about, Jeremy?” My eyebrows raised as she continued, “I know you too well. You come here to sort things out in your mind. Is it about Victoria?”
I shrugged my shoulders and countered, “Yeah... sort of.”
Devon frowned for a moment before saying, “You’ve been
pretty mum on the subject this past week. It must be really awkward for you to see her and Lindsay together. I... It’s that way for me. I don’t like seeing them together.”
“Why is that, dear?” I asked, curious.
“I love Lindsay just like you love her,” Devon replied.
“It’s not that I’m jealous or anything. I’ve seen Lindsay with plenty of other people over the past seven months. It’s just awkward for me, Jeremy, because I know it’s very awkward for you. That’s it. For me, it would be like you and my ex-girlfriend from Pennsylvania, suddenly becoming close friends... maybe even lovers. I don’t want anything to do with Jennifer again. I know you feel the same about Victoria. Is Lindsay so naive that she can’t see that? I would go crazy if you hooked up with Jennifer.”
“Lindsay sees what I tell her,” I said to Devon. “She asked me if it was okay if Victoria stay a little while longer than originally planned. I told her it was. I knew that she was really enjoying her time with Victoria. I told her I had no problems with them being friends.”
“At your own expense...” Devon shook her head and went on, “I do know you too well, Jeremy. I think someone needs to tell Lindsay what Victoria being here is doing to you. I know she is still young and inexperienced, but it seems as though all it would take would be some common sense.”
“Lindsay hasn’t done a thing wrong,” were my words.
“Why do you let people walk all over you?” Devon asked, a
hint of emotion in her voice. “How many times has Amy did that to you? Just last week, you asked her on Jessica’s first day here that she allow Stephanie to come to dinner without her slut collar and leash on. Amy said no, and you gave in.” Devon shook her head again and added, “You should have told her this is your island, and she should be more respectful of your wishes. Put your foot down for once!”
“Stephanie did come to dinner that night without her collar and leash on,” I said, offering a reminder. “As things turned out, Amy did honor my wishes.”
“That’s beside the point, though!” Devon told me. “She didn’t at first. You let Amy walk all over you. But that was minor compared to this. When are you going to put your foot down and send that bitch back to California?”
My eyes went wide as I said, “I hope you’re talking about Victoria... not Amy.”
“Of course I’m talking about Victoria! When are going to say enough is enough, and send her home?”
I paused, then offered my friendly (too gracious) smile.
“You seem to have a vested interest in this, Devon.”
“I do!” she exclaimed, curling up close to me and placing her head upon my shoulder. “I don’t want to see you get hurt again, Jeremy. I really don’t. I... I just don’t trust Victoria. I don’t trust her at all. Plus, she really has no business being here on the island. Victoria was NOT invited, and she is NOT one of us. DEFINITELY NOT.”
“Good to see that you’re looking out for me,” I mused.
“What if she is after your money?” Devon openly wondered.
“That wouldn’t surprise me one bit.”
I shook my head and told her, “Victoria didn’t even know about my money until Lindsay and I told her about it.”
“I beg to differ,” Devon offered. “Six years ago when I was in Pennsylvania, I remember hearing a blurb about you on the news, Jeremy. About how you sold your Internet company for seven or eight-hundred million dollars.” She paused and added, “Now if I heard about it in Pennsylvania, I know it was big news in California - since that is where you were living at the time. I bet you anything that Victoria, who was also in California then, heard all about it.”
“Good point,” I told her, nodding my head. “You seem to have really thought things through, Miss Devon.” Still, I didn’t think Victoria knew about my money. She seemed too surprised when Lindsay told her I was a billionaire.
“But even if she truly didn’t know about the money, I STILL don’t trust her.” The 25-year-old shook her head before continuing, “I mean... look at what Victoria did to you, Jeremy. How can anyone be trusted after that? I... I don’t see how you can even stand the sight of her.” She held back a giggle and added, “You’re just way too nice, Jeremy. Too nice for your own good.”
“I’m starting to realize that,” I told her, taking a deep breath. “Where has it gotten me in life? Victoria left me standing at the altar. What Pamela did... she hurt me even more than Victoria. Now I’m on my third big relationship... with you and Lindsay.” I sighed before adding, “I love both of you. You know that, Devon. But things... they weren’t supposed to be this way for me.”
“What do you mean?” she asked, now reaching across her body and linking her right hand with my own.
“I always wanted to be nice and respectful toward women. That is how I was brought up. The world is full of guys who are jerks and idiots. I thought if I could be different, someone would really notice and fall in love with me. The right someone... you know? Nine years ago, it was Victoria.”
Devon nodded her head and told me, “I love you and your respectful side, Jeremy. Your nice side. But there comes a point when you have to put your foot down and take what you want in life. Why can’t you tell Lindsay that you don’t want Victoria to be here? Lindsay loves you, Jeremy, and she will not have any problems if you tell her how you feel.”
“It wasn’t supposed to be like this,” I said, continuing my earlier thought. “I spent five years of my life alone because of what Victoria did to me. Then along comes Pamela and basically the same thing happens all over again.” I gulped my throat and went on, “She left me, completely out of the blue. I loved her more than anything...”
“Pamela was never right for you,” Devon told me, her tone strong. “Pamela needed a strong influence in her life. You are just not the type for that, Jeremy. And I don’t mean that in a bad way. I mean someone to guide her around, to tell her how things are going to be. Someone like... Amy.”
I laughed at those words and replied, “They were together all last summer. But that was before Amy met Stephanie, and found her dominatrix side.”
“I wasn’t here last summer, unfortunately,” Devon said. “I like to think if I were, you and I would have gotten married, Jeremy. Not you and Pamela. You and I would be so very happy together as a married couple. I would have showed you last year that I was MUCH better for you than Pamela EVER was. Best of all, Pamela would have never been able to hurt you like she did.”
Devon’s words about what it would have been like if her and I were married reminded me of something which I had been neglecting to do thus far.
How in the world am I supposed to tell Devon that I have already chosen Lindsay as my future bride, over her?
Marriage was a very important thing to Devon. She even spoke about it when Pamela and I were still together, telling Cassidy that one evening how much she would give to be my wife. She has hinted about its possibility ever since Pamela and Trish left the island six months ago. It seemed as if Devon was proposing to me, without actually proposing.
How do I eventually break the news about Lindsay to her?
Without, of course, breaking her heart in the process?
“If you and I were married,” Devon continued, “Pamela and Trish leaving together would have been like Torrie leaving. It would have hurt you for awhile, Jeremy, but you would get over it fairly quickly. You’re still not over the loss of Pamela... even though you say you are.”
“You’re right,” I told her in a soft tone. “There are still days where I wonder where things went wrong with us. But at the same time, I think that way about Victoria, too. I hadn’t seen her in a good nine years. I’m not even over her. As I said earlier, things weren’t supposed to be this way for me. I thought being nice to everyone would lead to me leading a very nice life. So far, that’s not the case.”
“I think it will turn out okay for you, Jeremy,” Devon chirped, placing her head upon my shoulder once more. “You got me and Lindsay, right? Maybe one day, you and I CAN be married.” Oh God... another hint. “And Lindsay can be our little playmate, as she was for you and Pamela.”
THAT WAS HER STRONGEST HINT ABOUT MARRIAGE TO DATE!
“But you should really talk to Lindsay about Victoria,” Devon reiterated. “Sending Victoria back home is not going to hurt anyone but Lindsay. But I think she’ll get over it if you tell her how you feel. Well... it may hurt Amy and Stephanie, too. They seem to like having a fan of their porno work on the island. But they’ll get over it, too.”
“I can tolerate Victoria being here for now,” I told her. “Hopefully this is just a phase for Lindsay. Once she runs out of things to discuss with Victoria, maybe things will simmer down between them and Victoria can go home. They seem to talk solely about me - stories about me, from the past.”
Devon shrugged her shoulders and proclaimed, “Then I’ll talk to Lindsay myself.” I shook my head as she added, “If you won’t stand up for yourself, Jeremy, I will. What’s going to happen when Lindsay and Victoria wind up having sex with each other? It’s GOING to happen, Jeremy. You can see the attraction between them. Remember what Amy has always said about Lindsay? If it moves, she’ll have sex with it?”
I frowned and nodded my head in agreement. “Yes, I know there is something there between Victoria and Lindsay. But please, Devon... please don’t say anything to Lindsay about it. If something needs to be said, it should come from me.”
Devon gave me a far-out look and asked, “Are you going to talk to her about it NO LATER than tonight, then?”
“I don’t know,” I responded, to which Devon let out an exaggerated grunt. “Give me some time to think about it. I... Lindsay seems to get along so good with Victoria. I don’t want to take that away from her. Not yet, anyway.”
“One of these days, you’re going to get a will of your own,” Devon told me, shaking her head. “You need to look past what good Victoria is doing for Lindsay, and worry about yourself for a change.” She frowned and said, “Fine, Jeremy. I won’t say anything to her about it. FOR NOW.”
“For now?” I asked, my eyebrows raised.
“Victoria can’t stay here that much longer,” she told me.
“I don’t want her to hurt you again, Jeremy. As I said, I don’t trust her. I think she could be after your money. If so, she has NO RIGHT in being here. Well... I think she has no right in the first place...”
Devon paused and added, “This beach sure is beautiful... you know that, Jeremy?” As both of us gazed out at the incoming waves, the luscious blonde patted me on the chest after several seconds of silence and proclaimed, “Things would be so much better if you married me instead of Pamela, Jeremy. I’ll forever wish that you brought me here last summer instead of last winter.”
“I would have snatched you up well before Pamela ever had the chance. We’d be the perfect husband-and-wife!”
Telling Lindsay about my feelings concerning her and Victoria now seemed simple compared to what I will have to say to Devon somewhere down the line.
I wanted Lindsay to be my future bride. I loved Devon very much, but Lindsay ranked just a bit higher on my list.
How do I say this to Devon without breaking her heart?

<<<- End of Part 6 ->>>